Friday, April 30, 2010

There is Nothing Else i can say.

My Internet at home has packed up. Up Nepa. One of the days they decide to give us power, they go and do power surge. We would have been better without the light. I liked the gen current better. anyways so I'm internet less, because these swift people will come with one Long ass story that Trust me u don't even wanna know about. And mother dearest is forming deaf. Na wa.


Anyways yesterday at work a co-worker of mine gave me one gist like this. Sthg about his "friend" ( who by d way I strongly suspect is him) met one girl and then they didn't talk and then 2 weeks outta the blue the girl texted and asked him 2 buy her brazilian hair.

He didn't reply, one month after the same girl( after no prior contact) asked him to senf her 250k ( two hundred and fifty thousand Naira). This time he replied asking If she wanted to start up a bizness and what not. She said no, she just wanted the money, and he said No.


Another two months later, she texted him and said her birthday was coming... By now I had tuned out. Like totally tuned out, see Personaly I am SICK and SO SO SO tired of hearing stories like this. It is Over rated and it is terribly one sided. So when I tuned back in I asked him " how did she get his number" he said , "oh he gave it 2 her". Which means they had probably met at this nice wedding he saw this hot babe, spoke to get got them exchanging numbers.

Now whether or not they had sex, I don't know, I wasn't there. He swears his friend ( who I strong suspect is him) dint touch yer. *i hear una*

I know Women are NOT stupid. Nobody will ask you for that kind of money out of the blues. Except 1. U owe her. 2. She knows u are going to give her.


I'm sick and tired of men chanting all women are gold diggers WHEN all they bring to the table when they meet a woman is their wallet. Sweets you attract your kind, if you want to define your values by money, that's the kind of girl you will get. EOS.


So after we argued back and forth and got some other co-workers in volved. He said I should read a write up called ify's diaries. Its about a 29 year old girl who wants to get married and keeps attracting married men and what not. Very typical, at least every1 knows one of these kind of people. The write up portayed her to be a materialistic girl who wanted to be the girl that had the amn with a nice car and bespoke suits and what not.

I know boys that have refused to date girls that don't have cars. Shocking abi?? But when a man doesn't have a car and its a turn of Girls are materialistic.

I know boys who don't like girls that dress up. And look all fancy and stuff. Oya shey u have that cassssssh upgrade the sister. No, Never. Mba. They will die 1st before they do anything good for her. And IF peradventure he does make her look nicer than she was when she met him. And they spilt for whatever reason, the girl becomes the gold digger who ran off with all his money. NIGGA PUHLEASE!!!!!!


See its that mentality right there I am tired off. Personally I'm not easy on Aristo girls, you have no excuse. Because I know some# I went to QC with and she couldn't afford uni fees, she worked at Mr Biggs (yes ke) for 5 years while the rest of us were in Uni, I had a job at her office and I ran into her and she told me she was retiring and was going back to uni. So basically all of you doing aristo.

As I said u have no excuse.

The mentality I am Not tired of however is men actually doing stuff for women. Excuse me, I'm jejely on my own, then u come and start asking me to have lunch with you, after much persuasion I agree. Only to take me to chicken republic and spend N2k and then get mad that I refused 2 text you back??? Huh?? Cuz I had lunch with you?? And then u open your mouth to say "after I took you out to a wonderful lunch" *cough* Nigger not that kind of Nice.

Nice like you meet her and you don't start bragging about how ur father owns Net building. Like you call her a couple of times and if she isn't intrested leave her alone. And Boys don't lie, we all know you know when she isn't intrested. Leaving her alone is the Nicest thing. Nigerian Men must think that Persistence in chasing girls is one of the fruits of the spirit. Its not. Stop. Nobody wants 2 be rude to you, they just want you off their backs. Its annoying and then you become irritating.

Yes. Back to the nice things, you can take her 2 a movie, not some ridiculous resturant you can't afford and when she orders you'll be coughing and u'll order only water. Smh and its these kind of men that. Cry gold digger the most. Nigger please.


Perosnally, I will not Pay for any 1st dates. Yes ke. If you can get a date out off me, THEN u'd better pay. I know my worth, and its NOT the stupid movie but the fact that your willing to pay and you will. Because I will make you, even if u had no intentions of paying. Says a lot. But nooooo because there are independent women now, yall shoudl just close shop on looking after girls properly. Abeg.

That's my own sha, if you don't have a car, no biggie as long as you don't live in Ikorodu town and expect me to get a cab there. That's coo"m if you are gonna send your friend to get me. Fine, but there is a line. I'm not asking 4 a man in a sport I'm in intrested in who can look after me. And no I'm not high maintaince. I just like and I was made for the finer things in life.

But seriously tho is there anything wrong in wanting 2 marry a man that drives a sport?? If yes what? To me its the same as marrying a woman that has a nice ass, or one that gives super head or one that turns sexy Amala. I mean its not the whole deal but it should be in the contract abi???


My home girl is single and she claims she is searching, he lifestyle dosent depict that ooo. This my friend ehn. She is still in uni and when I see her shopping bags I'm like babes where did you get all this money 2 buy this ish, she'll be like free. Men I love this girl to bits and all cuz she is like my sister BUT there is no way I'm letting her near any of my male friends now. Maybe in the next 5 years when we all have our ish together, not now that nobody is intrested in catering to her. She made it very clear, she wants some1 that has money. And I don't know anyone that has that kind of money in my social circle anyways so pass.

In other totally unrelated news its Jimi Daodu's bday. He is my home girls boyfriend so I don't expect you to know him. But if you do, wish him a happy birthday. She does love him to bits. And I am not a fan *kanye shrug* "bet" its her life jare.

In other related news: I'm good with my sister from previous posts apparently we were mad about two totally diff things or at least what upset me wasn't what she was talking about. All is well is all that ends well.

Last night when I was supposed 2 be studying my homegirl called me to do amebo. Apparently one of my ex-flames in Uni had been expelled. AGAIN. *sigh* these private schools can take the fucking piss. My God. Last year he was in a car accident resulting to the death of another student. Then they called him back. 2 months to raduation, he got expelled again. For going home for easter. Yes that's d reason why, and know that school they'll add a million other offences to add to his list of why they had 2 expelle him. Please let's Vote.

The youth, let's go out and vote. I know it seems small but this is the link up. When you vote, there is change in the educational sector, the federal universities start to function and rubbish like this won't be happening in glorified secondary schools. Its sad. Personally I don't want my kids to go to school abroad, see my camp blog posts. I don't want clueless kids. The other day my cousins whom their parents believe the ducational system in the Uk is better hence they have bEen there all their lives came home. She saw danfo amd called it a "caravan" I kid yoy not. She was now looking for the gypsys. Who does that to their kid?? Because of strike?? Or what? Abeg let's all go out and fix our country jare. Because you see, I'm tired and sick and tied of complainuing. Kmt.

Yessss exams in a few. *dancing alanta* I can't wait for them to gooo. I'm taking piano lessons tuesday and thursdays once I finish and I'm excited. Maybe I'll have that 21st party I've been dreaming about?? Yes no? Whatever.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

happy

I am really really really happy.

And thankful. Sometimes it takes the tiniest things to make me realise how blessed I am.

Today I came across some1's blog. Whose views on love I respect. Her I don't care much about.


And she wrote (paraphrased) sthg about how he said" peyton its you I see myself with at the end with me" she feels this is the perfect declaration of love.


BoTtom line I got sthg like that in an email on d 15th, and I didn't pay it any attn.

Yes if mr love came banging down my door, then climbing thru my domot and introducing himself I would miss it.

Lucky me I read, and I recognize it. At least in that form.

I had two options sometime last year.

I know I made the right decision. And I wish him (the un-chosen one) all the best.

But I am happy. I really am.
I had such a fab idea for a blog and had actually formed the whole thing in my head,

Then I remembered my exams and all that went out the window.

I shall now proceed to do what I know how to do best, make it up as I go along.

I told someone I wanted to take 6 months off my life ( routine) and travel.

He said I'll turn into a hippie and break "his" heart. O_O I know. I thought that too.

In totally unrelated news, I have mock in a few. I am worried. I have started loosing weight.

I've stopped working out and I've started eating at odd hours.

God bless him for sticking thru all this my "unattentiveness"

And I look a mess, my soap finished and I can't be bothered so I'm using err dudu osun now. Ie the pimples are back, with a vengeance. And I'm not even bothered.


I just really really need to pass these exams. :(

And I still can't pray, please if u read this, help me pray.

I really wish I was so much closer to God.

In related news, some1 I love so much read a post of mine and took offense, she said I made her look bad.

I'm sorry. I didn't think you would have been offended. I would never consciously upset you or make you look bad.

I've probably lost that friend, but what worries me is that I'm almost ok with it. I mean I am sorry but I don't want to take it out or call her or something or do anything to fix it. Exam blues or I'm just plain bitchy. I'll find out soon enuf. I am worried tho. We are or do I use 'were' very close. She is practically my sister.

That being said, Demilades bday was yesterday. I wish him a better year than the last. And favour all year round.

I'm coming to terms with who I am.

I am strong. And I can't depend on people so much. And I'm dealing with that.

Friday, April 23, 2010

another guest.

The rice I'm cooking on my blog must be sweet. All the guest bloggers I'm getting.
Its doing me Yori Yori. Nengi writes :


I have never tried writing before. I’m still searching for my talent. I know I have a creative person stuck inside of me, I just dunno how to let her out. I love tv n books n art. I scribble a lot too. So when I was given this chance, I was like ‘yay’ n scared at the same time. Decided to play it safe n write about 10 things I know for sure. the only problem (I realized later on) was that I dint know 10 things for sure. I mean, to be sure about something, you should be able to bet your life on that thing. unfortunately, the older you get, the more you realize you are the only fixed factor and every other thing/ person is a variable factor. Nothing and no one is indispensable. Life doesn’t even stop for one second when you lose someone or something important. Since we cant stop time, we try to stop people (with our gifts/talents, beliefs). Some people are lucky to know their gifts right away. Others like me, have to search for it. The important thing is that you never stop trying (at least that’s what I learnt from the parable of the talents). Anyways, lest I bore u some more, here are ten things I know for sure:

10.       Nothing and no one, no matter how important, is indispensable.9.       Ever notice how much better u do when there’s a bunch of haters waiting for u to fail and maybe just one person who believes in you? Thank God for your enemies, they keep you alert.8.       There’s nothing as important (ok maybe there is) as a mind of your own. In Stephen Covey’s words, ‘don’t always go with the flow. if you do, you will end up where the flow goes, which is downhill’. And as we all know, if you stand for nothing, you will fall for anything7.       This thing called love, who understands it? It makes you do the silliest things. How can it be said to be a nice thing?6.       There’s a nice side to everyone. that's why open hatred is hidden love. the moment you start talking to someone, you realize such person is not so bad after all (that's how I got my first bf). I learnt the trick along the way, if u don't want to ever like a person, don't start talking. Not even to be polite.5.       Success has many friends.4.       Dress like you want to be addressed. Am I the only one who noticed that fashion nowadays tends to cover more? ( leggings under short dresses, cardigans, pashminas, etc)3.       The arm of flesh will fail you. never vouch for anyone. Sometimes I cant even vouch for myself.2.       When in doubt, shut up! (or ask a friend in a low tone) It’s always better to shut up and allow people think you are a fool, than to open your mouth and prove it. There is nothing I find more attractive than a smart mind and there is nothing as disgusting as a person who can’t make intelligent conversation.1. My family's amazing. i have been blesses with awesome friends too.I guess we could make some sense out of this piece.. Life is worth living, especially when you have the kind of people that can spice it up… Make it count and always help others make theirs count…
RIP-----Da Grin.

Work out plan.

*in sing song voice*

Thanks to kanye's work out plan, I'm the envy of all my friends *insert chopping mouth sound here* and I aint gotta work at the mall again.

*kanye voice* that's right to ur work, do them sit ups blah blah blah.

I know how much I hate chatting about a problem, hence my work out plan.

I devised a work out plan.

Really simple except I am really busy ( translation : I'm lazy as a pig)

So I skip 50 times a day. Or am supposed too anyways.

And do 60 crunches. 3 batches of 20 with a 90 second interval ( rest time)

I do this at 12am. And no I promise I'm not a witch.

Because skipping at work during lunch would be totally unrealistic now.

And I stop eating at 6pm.

Skipping is to reduce my overall body fat.

The crunches are 4 rock hard abs.

And no eating after 6 aids the crunches.

Its day 3 and all I've gained are:

Back pains from lying on the floor and

Yams from skipping.

Dear kanye and AN smith. Where have I gone wrong.

Today is supposed 2 be day 3. The pain of the crunches of day 1 and 3 are back with a vengance.

I shall continue my work out after my exams.

I told you I was busy (lazy)

And no I don't think yams are cute or sexy or whatever white ppl think.

Kanye just so u know, I'm suing, I feel cheated. :(

Babalawo

If u dey vex for carry your issue go mEet babalawo.

I love that line and I adopted it as my 2010 motto.

It has helped me tremendously not every1 can be happy with you.

That line is track 12 off da'grins album. CEO, and it featured bigiano.

And last night Da'grin passed.

When I first heard him, I thot hmnnn all these "musicians" have come o, who Is this one again?? Sounding like lord of ajasa.

Then I heard Kondo at bachuss. Life changing moment I tell you.

I feel deeply in love with the song and made it my ring tone.

I also became and activist for the song while on a social network site.

I introduced all my household to the song.

I also compared a another rapper to Da'grin. He found it offensive.

I wondered why? Anyone can get a group of words and make them rhyme, style of delivery is attainable with practise.

While to do this in Yoruba while every1 has become an english speaking citizen and still appeal. I believed that was talent.

And today this particular talent is no more.

Although my yourba is poor actually scratch that non-existent, I loved this guys music.

Now I only wish I had said hi, I love your music that day at swe, instead of being soo pissed.

Its sad, but its life.

Just when life was starting to love him, God took him to be with him.

I guess its true what they say, life is too short. So live it too the fullest.

Kondo remains an all time fave of mine. And I look to a future when my yoruba is perfected and it all started when I needed to understand da'grin.

God bless Segun and Fikayo for translating that night.

May God give his friends and Family the strength to bear their loss.



RIP Da'Grin.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Jag of all tradez

Without mincing words, the choclate city boys have failed to deliver.

I loved the Mi album. I still listen to it. Plus I've bought about 7 or 8 and would keep buying because people keep stealing. And its not their fault. That album is bad.

The 1st time I heard of Jesse Jags was from one demilade boy who said Jesse is a lot better than Mi. His flows are like a tetris game that keeps falling into place and the lines keep clearing. A basic high score game. His lyrics are tight and what not. He said jesse trumps Mi hands down.

I mean I know he is a good producer and all but this album had better grow on me.

Because all my hand keeps finding is the seek track button in my car. Yes I'm seeking a really good track on the album.

Altho we must give the choc'l8 city boys props for the photo shopping of the album cover.
I want jeSse on my natural remedy. His acne is nothing to write home about.

Still on the Nigerian Music I'm feeling :

Implication: Tuface. I saw the video and I think maybe I wanna rethink my stand on becoming a baby mama. That girl that was all over him in the video. I hate her. And 50% of me still wants tuface. As usual the song is banging!!

I like girls: Yq. Wande coal. Better get another hit track. Yq reminds me of you. And I really love you. Any hoos, I like really few girls,but I love this song die!!! Catch me shaking my tooshie to it at the club!!

Fi mi le: kas!!! Omo Yoruba le mi.. SWAGGER!!!!! Video on point. And this song makes me wind down and wish I were riding a convertible haba!!! I likey. ( To borrow yankee lingo)

Others are:
Some sound sultan song I heard that had light up Nigeria in it.
Mi: God bless you. Long but worth it.
Gbamu gbamu :9ce. This one is gonna grow on me.
Critical. Ikechukwu and Dbanj. I love ikechukwu. I love his body and I want to have little iks. Yolz ke. Ikechukwu can get this anytime. This guy probably has d eqivalent of traveler miles for the gym. Whatever that is. His body is to bad. And so is the song.


Best line from the Jesse jagz album: my flow is sicker than my president. Which is true. This album should get in an IcU for fixing. It is sicker than Yaradua.

Speaking of which Where is Yardie???? I miss him. No more 7 point agenda bashing by simon kolawole on this day back page. :(

And I am still a jesse fan. And I eagerly await the drop of Mi2.

#np nobody test me. Choclate boys anthem. Jagz, Mi and Ice prince.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

your life, your movie.

As told by Nono.

My second guest blogger. Yippe I'm getting people to write on my blog. *dancing alanta*


This is my first time as a guest blogger. I'm actually quite excited *silly grin*. I feel like someone just asked me to give a toast at his wedding lol. O well.... I know I'll do this blog justice(I'm confident like that...sue me :p). So my inspiration for this post came from Ore's post where she used pause and play. I hope you like my twist on it. :).....here goes nothing......


Blink Blink Blink
Pause Pause Pause

It takes a split second to blink(a full second if your eyelids are heavy :p). In that split second, you could miss a life changing event. Kinda feels like a pause doesn't it? Like the one above pressed a switch and you blinked(ok now I'm picturing God sitting infront of billions of flat screens with a universal remote in his hand. When he wants you to blink, he pauses you and immediately unpauses. Some of the screens are blank cos in that part of the world it's night and the people are sleeping). But seriously though, life is just a series of plays and pauses. Blinking is a very irrelevant pause. The more relevant pauses occur when you drift in and out of consciousness. Pause, Play. You faint. Pause. You day dream. Pause. You sleep. Pause. You have a lot on your mind. Pause?? (This one is up for argument). Basically anything that takes you out of your conscious world can be termed a pause.

Pauses are both good and bad. Good in the sense that a child could use this to block out an unpleasant event. Bad in the sense your lack of attention could cost you your life. Some pauses are highly irrelevant and of no consequence though(my best kind of pause). Know when to take your "pause" and next time you go for that audition and they say you are not good enough, just say "hmmmpphh, I was good for God innit?"(Little consolations). But err...you might consider saying that out of earshot of the casting crew just incase they change their mind later on :p.

Ps: my blog: http://astoldbynono.blogspot.com (Ore told me not to do this so I ofcourse had to :p) lol.

NONO

the last time i was out.

E: home girl1
H: home girl2
SuperD : home boy.
film director: superD's cousin
mrT: superD's cousin.
K: waste boy bull shit talker.
WG: waste girl. E's friend


as i said Going out is overated, but the last time i was out, it was actually really good. i shall change all the names here as I dont want to get letters, emails or Bbms sayins whatever...

so E and H wanted to go out, i said cool,i'll drive. so we walked home to mine and wow my car wasnt there. oh well. every one was already getting irritated. so i said how about i call superD. and they were like yeah call him. and i did. and he said.." oh im out tonight, i'll be there in an hour be ready"

PAUSE.

I take forever to get dressed, alone. i cant be ready if u give me 5 weeks advance on whatever you want me to do. i am only woman after all.

PLAY.

so he also asked" how many of you are coming i said oh me and two of my friends. E sharply interjected err i want to bring my friend" and im like WHAT??? Any ways i tell superD we are three but bring two cars just incase.

E says she wont go if her friend doesnt come.

PAUSE

I used to be friends with her friend, but now i cant even stand the sight of her friend. in my eyes she is a waste girl and i really did not want superD to see me hanging with a waste girl. and that was just it.

PLAY

E was getting into an attitude about how it wasnt nice, she already invited her blah blah blah. and H couldnt really be bothered she was after all going out to get drunk!!!

PAUSE
I dont expect loyalty from any female. i really dont. so i wont ask for it. in return i dont want anyone asking me favours that would inconvience me on a matter that really shouldnt be my business. and that was what E was asking me to do. because i love her i agreed.

PLAY

So WG was gonna be rolling with us, thank God suoerD was bringing 2 cars. so i told E i hope she dint expect me to be nice to waste girl. i was going to try to be civil to her.

fast forward.
superD pulls up outside my gate and calls me. off course im not ready, im never ready. but in about 15 minutes H and i come out looking cute and all that. so i get into superD's car and its MrT driving. lol so i pull a fast one and say oh i saw you people switch cars in the CCtv. i hate getting caught.

we go to E's house. meanwhile i keep wanting to "pretend i forgot" and just go straight to where we were going, but u know i love E too much. we got her and WG. they rode with SuperD in mrT's car.

MARQUE.
Thats where we went, i got lippy with a couple comments and on the way up film director whispers to me" ive only been with you 5minutes and i know you are a trouble maker" LOL what was he on about???i am a good girl. ahn ahn. anyways i dont answer him paid him little attention, i was here to have fun and i was going to.

we settled in drinks came and we started dancing, well i did. and i had on this tiny bodycon dress that climbing up my thighs. hissss and the white lady on the table beside me kept trying to put her hand up my dress. i walked inside and bumped into FD who mouthed the words "follow me" and im like "to where?" and he came closer and said "just come jo, trouble maker girl". so i giggled and followed him.

he needed help with the drinks he orderd at the bar...i knowwhat you are thinking. so i helped him carry the drinks and on getting there, i see K.*rolls eyes*

we dont say anything to each other. he looks me over, and i roll my eyes. K and i have a love hate r/ship kinda thing going on. lol. at least thats what superD says.

so we are having a good time, i look over to E and i ask "are you ok??" she says " its not fair im not having fun" in my mind i think" oh well u shouldnt have brought WG along then" i think she read my mind because she said" be nice". ok i was going to drop the attitude and be nice.

so FD and i get comfy on the couch and he touches my hair and says"i likey"

who says i likey?? yankee boys sef.

me: oh thank you.
fd: so what do u do?
me: i am an auditor. really boring there arent too many details.
fd: u dont seem boring. you are a bad girl.
me: O__O, O__o?? huh??
fd: i know you are a trouble maker and a good dancer
me: interjecting i am an auditor.
fd: yes you are an auditor:
me: what do you do.
fd: i just got in about 2 weeks ago.

PAUSE.
now i was at SuperD's to see the chelsea- inter game and that was about 3 weeks ago. im not one to slack so i sharply called him out.

PLAY

ME: but i saw you at SuperD's house the day of the game.
fd: oooohh you are the one.. heyyy * reaches for a hug*
me: err why are u trying to hug me?? i thot you hadnt come in then?
fd: lol i came in a day before that.
me: ehn ok so what do u do now?
fd: im a film director.
me: you are a porn star too??
fd:huh?
me: err people that shoot sex tapes them selves tend to get carried away and call themselves directors.
fd: OMG u are such a funny girl. no i am a film director.
me: if u say so. excuse me.

E moves so im sitting beside WG, and i say "hey you how have you been" she sais "ai" then im like "go talk to fd, he likes you," she said " ok"

PAUSE.
i really did think he liked her. she looks really good on camera, he would have liked her eventually anyways.

PLAY.

so after a bit there is some commotion, H was approached by a man who wanted to spend that ca aa assshhh on her, she said "im fine" the man got upset and threw money at her. K gotup and walked to tell the man to leave. the man got upset and started mouthing off at K. mind you,K is rich and veryvery proud. its ridiculous.

anyhoos the man slapped K's head with a stack. LOL. and K got off. trying to hit the man and ish every1 got involved including I offcourse, howelse would i have been able to give this gist so detailed like??

so after all of that the man was told to leave and we had 2 leave.H was drunk beyond measure. SuperD had to carry her out. she took off her shoes and WG gave her slippers. K insisted on taking her home,superD wasnt too bothered and so E and I had to turn watchguard on H.i didnt have power to tell her mother story at home.

REHAB.

We get there and H seems to know a LAT of people and wants to hug them and go with them.... errrr i have become her personal bodyguard. so i kept pulling her out of hugs with boys who werent so pleased. lol. and the likes. it was a really goodnight i ran into my lovers younger brother.( that story is for another post)

so Fd and i got cozy outside the pool, just talking about random stuff, my nice nails and just for a tease i asked if he would direct my sex tape i stated im really dark so i would want candles to provide the lighting. he looked shocked. i said " but you are a film director?" and he said" you are such a bad girl, you are a trouble maker" i smiled and said "dance?"
OMOoba was on and that is my song so we got dancing and we had to stop again because err i couldnt find H. i found her talking to another" friend" and she was leaving with him. she said *in slurred speech* he is taking me to the toilet i need to pee.

i said "i'll take you" so i turned and thanked him and took her to the bathroom. since there was a queue for the female bathroom, i had to ask some dude who was to go next if H could go.

Me: heyyy, please my friend really needs to go. do you mind
him: no sure, go ahead.
proceeding to the bathroom.. the toilet attendant guy stops us and says onlyone person can go, i say ok. H goes in.
him: i saw you at the MARQUE.
me: oh really??
him: yeah u are a really good dancer.
me: thank you.
him: why didnt u take her home?
me: she said she wanted to come here*shrugs*
him: and you brought her??
me: yes now?
at this point H comes out and i thank him again. and i start walking away
him: i didnt get your name.
i didnt look back. when i got to the pool my posse was getting ready to leave.

so we just rolled out.and that was that.

good times i tell you. really good times.

* note:
1.everything here is true and thats how i saw things that happened. this is not an attempt to be cruel or upset anyone, its a report of what i remeber the kast time i was out. offcourse many other things happened which i cant remeber or i left out. but you get my point.
2. i really do love E,H and SuperD
3. Fd: is filming a documentary in badagry as i blog this and he never agreed to direct my porn flick
4: i am not a trouble maker and a bad person
5:K isnt that much of a BS talker, i push his buttons. sometimes.
6. i had a bit too much fun.

Happy things about me.

well that topic should have been things that make me happy but some how, i dunno if i should change it or leave it blank.

from the top then shall we...ok no bottom.. wo i dunno jo.. ok no order then.

- converstaions like this;
him: have u found your iPod?, tell ur mummy to come and buy you iPad.
me: how much?, dash me now.
him: 200k.
me: *gasp* wait ooo 200 kobo or thousand??
him: vnt1009273 voice note. PLAY?
listening to voice note: OOOOOOOODDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEE
him: did you get my voice note?
me: lol, rotfl, stifling giggles..noo what voice note.
him: Ode.

i like to be silly and i like when people dont pretend to act serious when i get into silly mode.

- the flower growing on my neigbours fence that i can see from my bathroom window.
totally random, this plant/ flower/ shrub helps me pray. i see it hanging at 90 degrees every morning with nothing but a stem looking rather fragile holding it. when it was all green leaves i never noticed it, but in the last one year, every morning i took a bath at home in my bathroom and i saw this flower it had grown/bloomed into this beautiful plant/flower with yellow petals, and it made me soo thankful to God, for all the little things and big things.

-driving.
yes i still cant reverse and i get carpet burns on the sole of my right foot when in traffic and all that, but i love it. it makes me happy. i cant explain it. i wonder why people are always so angry when driving. diff strokes/ diff folks.

-undiluted morning fresh.
this one particularly excites me, when i get home everyday i wash my hands in the kitchen with my thick greeen morning fresh. to me it just feels nice, and it means people always say" OMG u dont dilute ur morning fresh?" little pleasures i tell you.

-my body.
forget the rude boy mode im in now. pot belly and all. i love my body, its d reason i always sleep naked at his.:) well there are other reasons, but this one is a good reason.

-school,exams et all
i love how focused i come across, OMG u r writing ICAN u must be soooo intelligent. yes i am an attention whore.

-attention.
this really should be boys, but i like female attention too. i dont want to show you all the facebook messages i have gotten lately. if i did you'll be asking what knid of person are you that you attract such people. well in my defence opposites attract.

-my girls.
i love my friends and im overtly protective of them. im one of those people that have mastered the art of taking panadol for someone elses headache. and no i am really good at it. infact im soo good at it, the offending party doesnt ever see the attacks coming.

-my friends in love.
these ones just give me a pointer of what i have refused to turn into. i get u love your man and all that but puh-lease can we drink water?? in peace? thank you. my home girls boo's bday is coming up, she wants to paint his room?? O__O. thats what i thought too. err are you a painter??? she said she would get a painter. *roll eyes* err what of the sitting room and the whole house...oh and by the way the said boo lives with his parents. i found this f-hilarious. like OMG im gonna drop dead from how silly people i know can get.

-cooking.
i LOVE the smell of boiling goat meat. i adore the smell of sweet corn in jollof rice. i love to cook. its the reason i have remained skinny all this while. cooking, the aroma used to fill me and i couldnt eat much. NOW i have a job and as i said, im sporting a belly.

-holidays.
mummy has soo spoilt us with holidays, my husband had better be stacked up cuz im taking a 4 week holiday every year, on his tab. the other 3 would be on mine. take note #dearfuturehusband.

-i have a landline.
and its nitel too. need i say more? well if u dont live in Nigeria, a nitel landline are equivalent too unlimited minitues. like seriously all the gossip in the world.. at my finger tips, bb has nothing on me.

-purple and yellow.
the combo of both colors hence the following make me happy: Ribena; Motions; and the outfit ciara was weraing in that" cant leave them alone video"

-my visuals.
i am strange, i see through people, and i see dead people.
ok thats just random, what i mean is i see people as thier characters. so if ur really nice and warm and ish you would be beautiful to me. insanely illogically beautiful. but if have a shitty character you will look like shit, esp with all that mac powder you have on.

-my new beauty regime.
i have gone natural. and i love it, my skin has cleared and my face smells like honey all day long. and what not.

-when i cry.
i cry over the most irrelevant things, a key i cant find, last time i cried was when i was at the saloon and i slept off and when i woke up i had these hideous dreads on my head. and i cried and cried and cried. im sure the hairdresser was shocked. and if u know me, you'll know i can cry and be happy.

-the hills
this shouldnt be here but i watched one episode and heidi and spencer are getting married. and heidi wants LC there and LC wont come cause she and spencer dont get along and what not. i like spencer tho, he reminds me a lot of my SO.

-writing
i write handwritten love letters, notes, cards and my writing is shiii but it makes me so happy. and i never actually give them out. so i keep them. i know i like to do that.

- saying NO.
i get a kick from saying no 1st. even if im gonna or i have already done it. yeah i know strange.

-watches.
i want that toyWatch that is my profile picture. ive got about 10 watches now, and no im not a superstar YET. when i get there i would have THIRTY. yes one for every day of the month.

-sitting in on a friday night
going out is overrated jo.

my mum, my lover, my sibs, My God.
i guess i am a happy person because i can say no with ease. and im a tad unpredictable.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Hey Daddy.

DISCLAIMER: I LIKE MEN AND I DO NOT HAVE DADDY ISSUES.

that being said this has nothing to do with that usher song although i have been listening to it a lot lately. i still think his best album was and is and always be * drum roll* 8701 and i dont care what you think its my blog i talk my shiii.

so at this point i'll let you know i grew up without a daddy. well not exactly but u get my point.

my dad left when was in primary 5 and i havent seen him since then. yes my dad isnt late, i know where he is, he knows where i am, and i havent seen him.

ever since i found out his whereabouts ive been toying with the idea of going to see him. ALONE without my brother or my sister and ask him why.

see growing up it was my sister and mummy, then me and daddy. my brother was everybody baby. but my dad and i were rather close.

i get an email once in a while saying " how are you?, have a nice week" from his email adress, but i do not know if he actually sends them, its a group email like the equivalent of a forwarded BBm message.

so my Mum ( God bless her) raised my siblings and I. and i have the best of everything. trust me, she may not always be around but she takes out time to show me how much she loves me. and i love her.

now you may think its my right to be looked after by my mother, but i'll have you know that it really isnt, the bible calls a man who cant look after his family and infidel. but she didnt mind, she sold clothes, gave up holidays and God knows what else she did to make sure i had all i wanted.

my mum taught me " what you dont have you dont need"

i dont have a daddy, does this mean i do not need one??

off course all my shitty relationships/ relations with men shall be blamed on the fact that i had no guidance. i remember attending my fathers mothers 70ieth birthday at ibadan or so, and my daddy drove us ( the family and i) to and fro because my mum had to be home or something like that. and when we got home. she kissed him in the sitting room, right there in front of all of us.

this is the singular memory i have of my parents happy and married.

funny i dont remember the fights, but i know there were a lot, especially towards the end, i have blanked them from my mind.

i remember having my grand mother attend my open days in primary 6 because my mother had to go to work and my daddy had left.

two years ago if 10 men walked into a room and i had to identify my dad i wont have been able to. however now i can make a guess.

because two years ago, i met my step brother. or half brother, who happens to be older than my sister who in the last 23 or something years we believed to be my fathers first child. my half brother is really cool. he looks like my dad. alot. i used to look like my dad. now i look like my Mum. i dont understand that.

last year or so my mum took us to see our dad's father. he used to be a doctor. she ordered us not to eat anything there. lol.

we gave our phone numbers, and since then my fathers people have not let me have peace. they call religiously. it gets disgusting. and no i want no relationship with them. my siblings have all changed numbers at least 10 times each and my mother and asked them to stop calling her. so they keep calling me.

the other day my fathers sister came to the house. i dont know how she found us but she came, apprently to apologize. lol. all the cars in the compound made her very sorry i guess. once in a while she makes effort to call and what not but as i said, im not too intrested. the other day she came around and while leaving she suggested that her daughter come and spend the weekend. #screeccccchhhh i knooooooooow thats what i thought too.

her daughter is done with Uni and would need a job soon, who better to ask than their sister inlaw who they aided thier brother to abandon, cuz he was a big oil shot, back then. oh well. you win some, you lose some.

1st of january last year, my daddy called me. well not me, my mum and asked to speak to me and i think two years before that as well. he asked what school i was in and when i told him he said" isnt that too expensive, how can your mum afford that" imagine.

i wonder why men especially some husbands think once they leave, the womens lives end. probably because some women act like that. a man leaves you and you dis-intergrate. maybe thats why im hard on girls that act like thier foundations have moved. it really annoys me, because u were before he came along or maybe u werent, just get a grip. gasssssshhhh.

this post isnt about those loser girls tho. its about my daddy.

so word on the street is i have to look for him eitherways since they would have to ask him for my hand in marriage. i already asked my Cousin to give me away. my mum insists my dad should do it. well i'd rather him than the man she re-marries. innit?

oh well, daddy isnt coming home anytime soon i may as well go get him.

altho i have been told having a father is over-rated. a lot of people have advised me to let it go.. your mum is doing super good( which im totally thankful for)

but some times i want daddy, and its not just the same.


#np Hey daddy Usher.

Monday, April 19, 2010

The Search

today i finally looked through some schools, i wanted to get this over with asaply so im opting for the UK. thier programs are one year. is this a good thing? i hope so at least Mummy would be happy.

and what is all this talk about Gmat again?? abeg im tired. exam everywhere, shey i cant just go to school ni?

in other good news he saw my skin and say " E wo skin"

its yoruba, it means see skin, in admiration.

1st time since i can remember that i got my period and i didnt have huge pimples on my chin.
i actually havent had any funky sized pimples of late.

i cant wait for 5pm to come. so i can go.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

why Not??

I was gonna write a really personal post but last minute changed my mind. Because I'm having a conversation with my friend on black berry messenger.( I had 2 type that out cause of the silly symbol auto text thingy ) anyhoos. She likes this guy and they have been off and on for a bit. And what not. And they both came by 2 see me tonight. So as girls since the guy is my like my bestie I asked "what's up with u ppl?" And she goes I like him but I can't just be shagging him. I'm leaving in 2months.


Now I dunno if its just me but what is up with girls and time??? U are leaving in 2months why d hell won't u just live one day at a time???

So I asked "why not?" And she gave me a number of logical reasons why, non of which I endorse but since I respect and love her, I said ok. Whatever makes u happy. Altho I know she isn't.

Exam is in 29days Yes I'm counting. And I've had 2 cut short weekend holidays at lovers to one Nighters. Ewwww I hate it. Hissssss. I love the food there. Nono shut up. :d

Now there is some1 who follows my blog and reads every post. And comments on most, I know ur thinking duuuhh every1 who follows u reads ur post. Anyhoos. "Le dynamic professur" thank you. I appreciate it. And I want to follow you but I err do not know how to do that. *insert embrassed bbm emoticon here* like my technology skills are nothing to write home about. And to think I have an "NIIT" certificate. LOL.

Down to the bidness.

I drove to school today, and back alone without L plates. Well I had my hazard lights on my way to school. So I woke up today and I didn't feel like sitting in the back seat of a cab. So I said "why not drive" I mean I have been 2 driving school. I didn't take d tests or finish or anything like that. But I can move d car now abi?? So I "gingered" my aunty to let me drop her at church. She was rather reluctant. Buts she agreed, after we xouldnt find a cab.
Anyways I can't reverse. Well I didn't take d class so I just make it up as I go along.
And no I am not crazy. I just really like 2 drive. Actually I like to be in control. A these days a car is the most control I get over anything so. And funny I can actually really think, like analyze stuff while driving.


And there are a LOT of angry drivers in Lagos. And it was a sunday, why are u upset I mean its barely 9am who or what could have vexed you like this.


And I now know my way to Magodo. I drove to school, parked my car and took a bike/ motor cycle/ Okada there and it wasn't so hard to find. Lol. I am a lazy rat. Besides I like actually Love Okada rides. Don't ask me. I just really like it.

Found 2 songs I love driving too. Undertow. Timberland the fray Esthero.

Melt my heart to stone. Adele. It sounds a lot like burn but heyyyy.. I just love them both esp Undertow.

Now I have a couple friends that go off at every little thing their man does. Now I have a good man but he wasn't always a good man. And I wasn't always a good girl. And I am still a bad girl, but that's when I need to be if u get me. Anyways I keep wanting to tell my friends that its a mans world, and women make relationships work and. All that but I come off as a preacher. *sigh* but really its the women that do majorly all the work in relationships, if u are. Looking for a man that's gonna work in the relationship you may as well start living in a tyler perry movie. Now I am not saying there aren't good men, I'm asking what are you expectations from them? And change them. U ask why?

I ask Why not?? If your last 10 relationships ended the same way and you keep ending up back at square one. Err baby u have the problems. Go fix yourself, stop watching them movies and get ur act together. Revisit that loong ass lists of qualities I want in a man. For all u know you may be looking for mr Impossible. And no not MI. Like a man that doesn't exist.

When ever I look at my room I wonder if I am ready to move anywhere.

I'm scared. I hate saying that. However I can say it here because no one is gonna judge me. I am supposed 2 be going for a masters in January, and I haven't applied.

I am afraid I won't be able to make an LDR work.

I am afraid I'll hate my house mates there.

I am afraid my mother will make me go to the Uk and make me go from home.

I am afraid I will hate it.

I am not a fan of making new friends. All over again from scratch.

I know this because I am one of those diamond in a rough people. The type that are reeally nice but puts up a shield because that way its easier to sort out the people to let in. You know, kinda like I put up a wall not to keep anyone out but to see who is brave enough to break down the wall.

Now I'm afraid I can't put up a wall anymore. I love my friends here, my job (even tho I feel myself becoming redundant) my family, my routine.

And I'm going to leave all of that and go to some place where I can't come home in 2 hours. I went to school in yaba and Ota. I could get there via road. My mum could pull a surprise visit.

Not anymore. No more come downstairs, I'm outside calls.

And to think I just called out my friend at the beginning of this post for worrying about 2months. And if I don't get in in Jan I'll be around till may,or july or sept or sthg. Altho mummy is HELL bent on getting me outta the house next year.

Plus all her chiming of "when I was ur age I was married"

To my sister its " when I was ur age I had, had U and Ore"

Yes my mother has caught the marriage bug too. Some one must have told her grand children are some sort of validation to her peers. She keeps reminding us everytime she buys aso-ebi that she is doing this so that people will buy when she is selling, and we have refused to allow her sell.

It sounds funny but when you hear this everytime she comes into the room, it begins to grate on my nerves. But I still love her.

Maybe if I get knocked up without getting married. That way every one wins. I don't have to get married, and she gets her grand kids.


Hey.... Why Not?? :D

#np Human Nature. Mj.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

again today/ random thoughts

I am blogging from my . Because my driver. Or the one my mother employed and my lover insisted must be in the car at all times with me. Since I'm such a shitty driver did not show up. Yes after disappearing yesterday the stupid fuck refused to come to work. Hisssssss


I'm not even pissed anymore. Just sad for his family. He has to go.


So since I drove to work and work happens to be in marina there is no packing space. And did I mention my tank was empty??? So I couldn't drive with the air conditioner on?? And I wore or I'm wearing a sweater???


Anyways since there is no packing, I had to call my other driver, the more sensible of the two, who happens 2 be on leave to come and get the car. I called him by 9.30. Its 9.55 he isn't here. And he lives on d next street. I'm not even angry.


But I can't leave the car because I'm parked in between 2 two "no parking signs" and I can see a tow van. Plus it isn't even the company I'm auditings side I'm parked in.

AND I told the security guy that I wasn't coming down till my driver came 2 get fuel.

Got my nails did yday at my neighbors while awaiting my driver. Because when I go home I was locked out.

I used to weigh 50 when I was in Uni now I weigh 68.

My nails look like an escorts own.

I am fat. I nEED to get my act together.

The only person pleased with all this fat is my mum. Finally no more model talk.

I hate being fat.

So I'm gonna start walking again

Now its 10oclock and my other driver still isn't here. Maybe he went to ikorodu. *sigh*

I want 10million naira.

But I need about only 100,000 naira.

Apparently the person who made my hair used. A fake weave. It explains a lot

This happens 2 be the 1st time I'm getting my hair done and no one has asked for a refrence. :(


The hair is really shitty.

Apparently my boss gave me the wrong thing to do. Now I have to do it all over again.


I can't shout at my boss.

I hate being so lady like.

I'm just gonna take the bus home today. Since this is Nigeria, I'll just take bus. It cost N30.


It may also cost me my official laptop but so what??

And may earn me screaming from my lover. KBD??

Today is my uncles birthday. I dunno how old he is turning. He has that football age thing going on.


I would go and eat birthday rice at his tonight.

I wanted to go to magodo today. I can't drive myself there.

Because I do not know how to get there. *sigh* islander syndrome.

But seriously all the directional boards on the mainland point to either Maryland or Ibadan.


And if I do get lost in lagos. I won't hear the last of it.

Maybe I should get the damn L plates and get it over with.

I hate people that get on the elevator 1st floor and get out 3rd floor. Lazy fuck.

I hate people that have BO and smell when they enter the elevator.

The ones I hate the most, are those who get on at the 1st floor going to the ground floor especially when I have been alone the whole ride down.

I want to get a belly piercing. But I can't have sex till it heals.

Approx estimated time of healing totally = 6 months.

Pass on that piercing. *sigh*

I watched a Nigerian non-yoruba movie yesterday.

In the movie Mercy Johnson said " I distaste you" in stead of detest.

Who write these scripts? Do they edit Nigerian Movies at alls?

I aslo saw an advert of another Nigerian movie titled "far away from home"

It featured Regina askia.

The mercy Johnson movie was titled "white hunters"

And as usual she said "haba check and balance me" turning her huge behind to the camera.

Lover thinks she is ridiculously hot. She has a belly and is a dirty looking girl.

About her acting skills she and jim iyke rank the same.

Oh and beyonce and rihanna part 3 and 4 are out.

I think my exams are getting to me.

And I love yoruba movies.

Thank God I don't wear brown powder anymore. *sigh* the oil on my face is enuf to fry dodo.

Festus is coming home today. :D

I wonder why I am excited? I've missed our random conversations. :d


I think I see my driver now. Its about 10.15am

I also think I shud fix this  problem and add my boss back on bbm.

And dewumi too. And every1 who has complained. That I can't accept them. When I don't get requests.


I want a bold two.

I need a back rub.

I need a holiday get away. This 9-5 is not for me

I was made to enjoy the nicer things in life. And I'm tired of waiting. I'm going out to grab them by the balls.

And no the nicer things in life aren't men. The balls thing is a metaphor.

I miss having nothing to woRry about. Like exams or my pot belly.

Irene would read this and call me dramatic. Babes get ur blog :d

Ok I'm tired. I want 2 sleep.

*yawn*

another rant

Now I like 2 plan and stick to my plans.

I'm very self sufficient which means I really hate having to ask favours from anyone.

When I make plans and I have to involve people I like 2 keep it 2 d minimum.

Now one of these people is my driver. With all due respect he is fucking stupid.

Yes I said it, FUCKING stupid. Thing is every one else that has 2 use him shares this exact same views.

Including my mum who employed him and pays him.

Personally Nothing will make me happier that seeing him leave.

He is Lazy and my mother seeing how hard-working the other one was left me 2 deal with this lazy fuck.

Well I am tired of being nice Today is the last time I'm going 2 consider the kids and wife and blah blah blah.

I'm letting him go. Why?? Simple his cup is full and runneth over.

Today I planned to visit the library and since 4oclock its 5.30 now I have been waiting for him.

Since I can't read at work I have wasted 1.30mins of my time that God will not give me back.

And I have also wasted N1000 on cab fare when I just filled my car tank yesterday. What $akes me Even madder is the fact that

1. The car is parked right where I left it.

2. The stupid rats phone is off.

3. He will get home and Lie that he was there all the while.

And if and if only he doesn't lie I may forgive him. But I'm sooo fucking Mad right now. I'm just going to order chinese.



KMT!!!!!

Monday, April 12, 2010

that maggi Ad.

Ladies,

According to the maggi add. Oh and maggi is a world known spice.
If u want ur boyfriends mother 2 like you...
Cook with maggi and according to the woman
Tima ( that is the sons babe) get home training, sabi cut vegetable and boil meat.

#quickquestion
Was it in his mothers kitchen she came 2 cook for her son?? Or what??

But never mind that tina sef carry degree. Plus she be correct african woman ( I'm assuming she has a huge behind or hips) so if u don't have... Dr Rey for u.

Bottom line Is this...
The way to a mans heart...
Is it through his stomach?

His dick?

Or his mothers kitchen??

I say if u can't cook in d kitchen, u had better be cooking in the bed. #okbye.

This weekend.

this weekend started on friday. i was stuck in school and wanted to see my lover. i really wanted to. so i sent him a bbm message saying " i miss you, i miss you, i really want to kiss you"

yes , forget all this bad babe i use to from im chessy like that. anyhoos, my battery died. so i got home saw my fam and blah blah blah.when the next thing, lover called, ande we got talking, convo went sthg like this.

M: hey boo
L: girlfriend.
M: what are u up too?, imiss you.
L: i miss you too, its not fair, come and see me.
M: im tired now, i just got back from school, and my car isnt back home.
L: what if i came to pick you?
M: err i already told you, i have other plans this weekend. *giggling*
L: so you are doing shakara now abi??
M: ahhhhh boyfriend... u know how it is now.. im tired,i need a back rub and a massage.
L: come outside jare.
M: ehn?? outside where??
L: ode, come outside ur house jo..

so i run downstairs barefeet and OMG he is there.

now my lover is probably the most selfish person i know apart from myself. (and baby just incase u do read this... i say this with love)

any ways so im screaming and dancing around and he says" i hope u have dropped the phone" typical him.

random ive had a million people come see me, boys girls blah blah, but no one ever comes to see me without callling first. i will not see you. i will not grant you audience. and he knows this, and he still came. and that was selfless enough for me.

trust me, boys are nice to me. but this act really hit home. especially considering the fact that he had to deal with that nasty traffic.

how was i supposed to say no?

so i packed my bags and went away. and that was just friday. dont get me started on saturday and sunday.:)

HOLE IN MY HEAD

2.15am Rehab night club

KISS

Looking around i checked to see if anyone saw. actually make that everyone. now im not one for pda but i couldnt just stop. especially since i have never had a bad boy before. yes i am an acclaimed bad girl.
that is the reason my lover of over
five
years decided to call it quits. well to be fair it was more like 1 year offical boyfriend, 3 unofficial lover and stand in bed warmer and almost two years of vicious toasting/ pursuing/ chasing/ *insert appropriate term*
now i have always had a man, i have never been single. in the words of my friends
you oreoluwa, were not made to be alone


well so i got down from the table after the kiss fiasco and stauntered past all off them. waiting to see who would be the first.

in as much as i despised the kissee, ultimate serial dater, bragger and total bull shit talker, i knew nothing would piss him off more.


earlier that night
clad in patterned wetlooks and a sequined corset with aldo sandals completing the outfit. i set out to hit the club with my girls.

i hate girls. if i have too out with them, something must be wrong. especially this set of girls, but tonight this was the exact company i needed, to get past this night.

earlier in the day.

i had spent 6 hours taking out my dread locks i had had on for the last 6 months, relaxed my hair, got a full fringe. God bless Yinka. i loved how i looked.

i skipped work to get my hair done, this wont be the first time though, but this time was special.


5.30pm
called a few of my friends, the ones i knew he could never understand and stand and invited them to a night out on me. all girls no boys.
i was finally ready to be single.
or at least be seen without him. i should have called my male best friend up and let him take out. but i knew better. besides my best male friend is a party animal. he was going to be there. well he had to be. he was a major part of my plan.



8.30pm Picolomondo

my best male friend has drinks there with his friends that have become mine. yes u heard me. beside his cousin has been giving me the eye for so long. maybe i should involve him?? No need to bother my pretty head. tonight was going well. acording to plan. this was a total feeler of what tonight will be. apparently the fring was cute. three bottles of red wine amongst four of us. and a couple of lewd comments about my dress. we left.

on my way out i saw his best friend. i was attached to bestfriends cousins arm. we looked very attached. especially as he was crawling all over me. i didnt say hi. and breezed past him and his posse.

i knew he already knew i was out tonight. thats what u have friends that talk about other peoples businesses for. that was why i invited this particular set of girls.

best friends cousin dropped me off, after a really long drive around the island. i love boys that are attracted to me. they are like play dough. he made me promise to be out tonight. i agreed. after all that alcohol he began to look "do-able".


11.45pm at home

walked in to meet the girls already comfy. proceeded to tell them the rest of the plans of the night. another bottle of red wine. i need to get loose.
after a shower, i began to get into the mood.

popping size 8 tags have never made me happier. all those hours at the gym and best friends pool had paid off. homegirl one said to me

sweetie, serena's ass has nothing on you




12.57am in the car, on adetokunbo ademola.

i see our get away weekend hide out and for that fleeting moment, i am sad. maybe i should be more forgiving. maybe i should let it go. homegirls see whats happening and say " maybe you should have taken him back", " he still wants you" ," even his mum begged you"

was i being too difficult, nope. i didnt think i was cut out to be in a relationship with someone who would cheat and lie to me. and then employ the public to beg on his behalf. that was typical loser behaviour. you did the crime now do ur time.



1.10am Rehab

driving in was a breeze, it was also one of the perks of being with him. its also one of the reasons why i hadnt made public knowledge our split. the other was just incase i did take him back. altho i doubt it. seeing his car parked there was funny. my space was empty. how these girls managed to get me this parking space remains a mystery till now. i hadnt been out in weeks.

i walked right into best friends cousin. he seem happy, maybe he thought i came for him. while exchanging pleasantries ( which consisted of a rather tight full frontal hug, a bit of necking on his part and a kiss on the cheek on my part) we saw the same best friend that was a picolo... i smiled and acknowledged him.i nodded. he seemed shocked to see me out. he started to walk towards us, to wait or to run....
bestfriends cousin must have been desprate to be introduced to someone i knew. seeing as he too d pain to introduce himself. *sigh*

i asked how he was and all that random weather talk. all this while BF's cousins arms were allover me. it looked very comfotable. a bit too comfortable. i walked away looking back only to make sure he was on his black berry alerting him. and as sure as tuface isnt done having baby mama's. he was. hhe looked up and smiled. i smiled back.


1.3oam Rehab. bestfriends table.

i didnt want to drink anymore, or have fun or table top dance. i just wanted to go home. then my phone rang and i saw the number i could never forget, noy in a thousand years. i also knew he was watching me. so i gave the phone to bestfriend and we both burst into laughter. i would never know why he was laughing. but i was laughing because it was working. all off it was falling into place.


1.45am Rehab. pool side.

sitting down by a pool having someone tel you how beautiful you are, its amazing. even more when its in the 1am hour and the full moon is so blue. and offcourse you have had so much to drink. actually toomuch to drink. so i sat and listened. when he asked how come i had this mini rose toywatch. i replied" my boyfriend wanted his back so i went and got mine" .that was the only refrence to him, the watch. we got them last year when we vacationed, he finally took timeoff work and so did i. it was a sunny afternoon. in all our five years together it was the only thing we had that was "his and hers" and i always wore his. till i left it at his and came in the next day and dint see it there. 2 weeks later someone else was spotted wearing my boyfriends watch. that i left on his bedside. the watch we hand picked. the watch i wore in our nude photo session in paris. the watch that was my promise ring. while mine sat on my dressing table. he wore it once. and i took it back. he was too careless i couldnt take any risks.


2am Rehab. bestfriends table
implication is on, im dancing and jiggling my huge bum everywhere ands really letting loose, having fun, i was almost happy. i was dancing with him. i really dint like him. he talked toomuch, and about nonsense. but i knew he was attracted to me. he made this very clear a number of times. the tennis braclet, i gave that out, since then he hasnt been so pleased with me. maybe it was the alchol but we were dancing and rude boy came on. he pulled on to the table.

2.20am Rehab

my phone is ringing and buzzing and blinking red. i love lagos. the gossip girls never sleep. i put it on silent and retract my home girls. that was hard. walking out, past him alone was harder. he wanted to talk. about what only God knows.

and my was bull shit talker a rather good kisser. maybe i should make him mine. maybe we'll have beach side sex.. maybe he'll be the new loveer.

2.23am Rehab

i notice how people are gathered, i snap out of my night dream and i realise he has been talking/ shouting/ pulling me. it was the pulling that snapped me out. then as calm as dove i said "im taking my girls home, breakfast at cactus 8.15am?, we'll talk without all the drama. yes?"

he said " dont be late"

i got into my car and drove off.
would i show up at cactus?? maybe...

Saturday, April 10, 2010

The cheating boyfriend/husband- A different perspective.

Apparently my sister Eneni, read my blog and had sthg 2 say.

So she is my 1st guest blogger.

And oh I wonder Y she censored the word "dick" on my blog we have that freedom of speech thing going on. Just incase anyone else wants 2 guest write. :d



Q1. All men cheat. True/False. If true move to Q2.....If false......still move to Q2.

Q2. All men are gay. True/false. If true...........forget it it's obviously not true.
Since we all agree its false then I guess I can say that females should also be held responsible for the men that cheat...60-40 men getn d higher %??? No?? 50-50?? Fair enough........

Read Ms Oreoluwa's blog (implication tuface) by the way I really like the song and the part that caught my attention was:

"And why do men cheat?? Simple, there would always be a girl waiting to derive joy from the fact that someones husband/boyfriend finds her interesting"

That part right there got me thinking.......I grew up surrounded by plenty of guys so I had the "guys are not to be trusted" mentality. Someone a couple of years back tried to convince me otherwise.....I wont say he succeeded 100% but let's go back to the main point.....
75% of girls make it 80 or even more won't hesitate to curse a guy who was caught cheating but remember, it takes two to tango??
So I asked around and thought of the possible reasons why girls get involved with the supposedly 'not available' men n I got d following:

1) I didn't know he was married/had a girlfriend: plenty girls use this one...for the marriage part, you meet a guy, start dating him, you always meet at hotels/friends houses, you cant reach him late at night, he tells you never to sms and all sorts and you think its normal.........naïve much???
And then the girls who fall victim to girlfriend deniers. These ones I almost feel sorry for. I know a guy dating 2girls at the moment, chasing the 3rd. Cant help but wonder how much time he has on his hands or how much drama he can take because I know we girls have issues......obviously once in a while they get suspicious, he lies, they believe and life goes on..........
If you find yourself here, deal with your man NEVER the girl, afterall he denied you in the 1st place.

And yes some married men deny their wifes too......

2) I fell in love wit the wrong person: correct me if I'm wrong but love doesn't happen overnight....or does it??? You meet a guy, there's obvious chemistry, you find out he has a family/girlfriend yet you still call/chat/visit him regularly and later you blame cupid???.........that's more like stupid. Yes I know love can be a bitch but in this situation you led it on.

3)Mistake: I've heard this one a lot, 'I didn't mean to, it was a mistake". In the words of eminem "what? You tripped, fell and landed on his d***??" better still 'blame it on the alcohol' alright permission granted.....but you keep going back to him?? Good mistake that must've been.

4) Less complicated: boys are too possessive, boys have too much drama.........I want sex with no strings................2nd place is good enough for you..... Really?? If you say so.

5) He said he'll leave his wife/girlfriend for me: LOL!!!!! You really don't believe that do you?? 'Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free??' Ok fine he marries you.......you know he'll cheat right?? No?? Do you need a reminder of how you got in so fast??

6) Revenge: ok my friend suggested this one but I really don't want to believe girls are this stupid........his chic did somthing to you so you start dating her man/husband....infact scrap it.......no one is this silly.

7) Money: this is the most popular reason (even though they rarely admit it). I know a girl who barely an hour after meeting a married man was on her way with him to a different state....errr have you ever heard of rituals?? Forget rituals whatever happened to values?? Someone said: 'what's the point afterall you sleep with your boyfriend for free' all I could say was WOW.
A while back some girls drowned in the ocean (yes ocean) after their boat capsized on their way back from Nembe (an island in Bayelsa). They went for the coronation ceremony of one of the chiefs... Wen I heard, the 1st thought I had was 'how much were they paid??' That's my village and the water still scares me. It'll take you almost 3hours using a speedboat from port-harcourt........no matter what,. The pay can't be that good.


And of course the girl struggling to make ends meet/feed her family/train her siblings........life has been hard.......I really hope things get better for these ones......its a pity the girls in this category r relatively few.

And I ask "you know about karma??" The usual reply: whether you do it or not your husband/bf will still cheat" and it hurts that this is the truth....as long as there are girls with this mentality out there......some even dont wait to be toasted any more.......they'll run after your man.

Finally we all know how wedding vows go "for better for worse.................forsaking all others till death do us part." You say I do, slip in the ring, right infront of God and you break it??? Let's thank God for his mercies. I'm sure If you made that vow in okija shrine you'll think twice before breaking it. I think some people should edit that part before saying the vows.


I'm not perfect, NO ONE IS. But before we condemn men saying "all men cheat", we should accept that they do so because we females allow it. If EVERY girl decides not to have anything wit these "not available" men, I don't think the topic of cheating in relationships will pop up so often...................except of course the gay guys.... Those ones are on their own.

A penny for your thoughts.

Eneni.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

exams

I hate exams. Because they are NOT the true test of knowledge.

And because they stress me out. And deny me social interaction.

Yup I have or rather had a BE to attend of thursday but pow! I shall be studying.
Pulling an all nighter.

I also hate exams because I get home late, study till late THEN eat late. Hence I shall gain weight like sthg is. Wrong with me.

3 weeks to the exams, I usually lose weight. So much I begin 2 look sick.

The only reason I like exams is I become Very close to God. Yup. I pray like hannah.

I cry. I wake up at 3am attempt a question, mess up and cry my eyes out.

Then there are all the people who keep telling me I will be fine. I don't want to let them down.

And then there are those people who I know are waiting for me to fail. I Have to let them down.

Then there is my mother. Who says " its ok if u pass just two papers" to calm me down.

She knows even worse than rejection what I fear most is failure. Especially when I need to redeem myself like I have to now.

Even more about exams I tie most of myself esteem to my academic perfprmace. Yup which means I feel good *insert james brown dance here* when I pass.

Why am I writing this.. Well I am at the library and I was writing and I just dozed off. Mid stream. I dint even take out time to move my books.


Typical day for me. I wake up. Get dressed. Get 2 work. Stay there till 5pm. Dash out head for school. Get there at about 6.30. Do a bit of PQ's. I leave at 9pm. Head back home. Sort myself out. Play with mummy. Sometimes watch a bit of BL. Get back 2 my room. Wash my face. I can't shower because if I do, I become to comfortable and sleep off. So I study till about say 2 am 3 ish. Get some sleep. Wake up by 6.15 or 30 depending on how lazy I'm feeling. Then do some more PQ's. Go back to sleep by 7.15. Wake up by 8am speed dress to work and blah blah blah. That's the wretched cycle I live. Thanks to my exams. Recently I've found myself dozing off. At odd hours. We can't cheat nature.


So today I hit the caffine hard! Coffee, kolanut and coke.

And I know some people out there are thinking, it really isn't that serious.

Actually it is. It always is. If I have to attend 26hours of lectures every weekend. Plus public holidays are full lecture days. It then becomes serious.

Hopefully I don't breakdown. I really am a strong person. I probably won't.

In other news

That over killing it remix aint too bad. Tho Implication. Is still No1. I think I'm wide awake now. Back to my books!!!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

implication Tuface

If you haven't heard this song, then clearly you won't understand.

Everybody Move, shift, dress. The kid is back!!!
This song is too on point.
The foremost contender of Nigerian Music or pop or RnB or whatever it is mr Idibia sings
He is back and he is on form!!!!

I love his music because everyone can relate. If u can't... U are like judas. Yes isicariot. The one that betrayed Jesus. Haba how can u not like this song???

This song is clearly a "bitches sit down, I run this industry" and I love that everyone knows

I won't mention names. But u better get down and dirty and go get ur act together istead of u living on hype.
Off course I have a picture with Tu_face. Yes ke. Thank you very much.
I ran into him at the club and shamelessly oggled him till he agreed to take d picture.


Now the kid is FresH!!! And I think what makes this song hot is the fact that the ratio of english to Idoma is like 1 to 15 respectively!!! Ooohhhh champagne is spilling from my wee wee. I Love this song. I love tu-face aND I wanna be a baby mama too.
Ok I kid.

But this song makes me ask a particular question.

Who do this beat??? ( No disrespect to MI) but the beat is wicked!
Now onto more controversial matters.

I saw butterfly on a wheel this holiday (easter) oh and happy belated easter holiday!!
Hope yall had a good one.

And why do men cheat?? Simple there would always be a waste girl waiting to derive. Joy from the fact that someones husband finds then intresting.

Or even better some other woman who will do it iresspective of the fact that they know he is married with 10kids from 5 women. Just like tu-face. *blush*

Altho I want 2 be his baby mama I know better. And I won't.
Even worse some people know better and still go ahead.

So I happen 2 know a particular boy that has been involved with 3 friends from d same circle. I know because they are my friends. And I asked his friend and he said. Women lack loyalty. That he has NO friend that will date his ex girlfriend.

I have few female friends and even I can't brag like that. He said all his friends repsect themselves too much 2 get that messy. There and then for that fleeting second, every woman that had ever sniped her friend or another woman after a man. Made me ashamed 2 be a woman. :(
Its just wrong. We are enough people in the world for every1 2 avoid dating their friends ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. There are too many diff circles. Yes I know he will be someones ex-bf, but that somebody should not be some1 you have called you friend.

Its just wrong. And that makes u a waste girl.

End of story.

IMO
Tu-face is the best... All the rest.. Can like 2 sit down!!!

Drive

You drive I'm assuming? Your assumptions are correct, do you need me to pick you up? No, but thank you. You are welcome. ...