Saturday, May 25, 2013

Progress and starting over.

I am taking a law course this semester.

I was feeling like I was not learning anything new so I decided to take a course in human rights law.

I am excited about it.

I have found the perfect nude nail polish for my skin tone.

I have bought speakers- and I have found that if I turn them up loud enough I can not hear my thoughts.

I find myself drinking large amounts of alcohol.
I want my mummy.

But since I cant have her right now- i'm going to make do with what I have.

My progress with the piano- My tutor okay-ed my picking out a new book. I'm so excited- I'm leaning towards Disney music books- I LOVE Disney cartoons and the songs even more.

I am also looking for a pole to buy. I LOVE pole dancing- I swear when I am pole dancing I feel my best.

I am telling you guys I was created for the pole. Obviously my body hurts to high heavens after BUT- I am so happy when I am on the pole ( I know how "sexual" that sounds by the way) you guys need to hear my pole dancing tutor. She says the oddest things like- clench your thighs when you are on the pole or work that pole, stroke it etc etc etc. Reminds me of when I was learning  how to drive.

I am at a cross roads in my life- It's probably why I'm doing all this drinking and playing my music as loud as possible.


But strangely I am at peace- Must be all the shopping I did in london. I am going to literally write a shopping list AND then stick to it. I find my style evolving. I'm beginning to like strange clothes. Like think kate middleton-esque dresses. which is strange because- i used to hate clothes like that.

I used to hate alcohol as well. Now I'm drinking unhealthy amounts. Even worse my gym has closed for renovation. which means I need to join another one.- I do not mind this one is 24hrs so I can go when I wake up at 3am. lol. AS IF.

I washed my make up brushes- I had no idea they were supposed to be washed. LOL- do not judge me.

This post is everywhere because I am obviously under the influence right now- but I would be back soon. :)

Hope you lot are having an ace weekend.




Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Self development

I know how I always feel like women have been inherntly taught that there is always something they can do to make them be better- lose weight, fix nails, bleach skin, sorry even out skin stone or whatever.

But trust me when I say despite my constant cries of weight loss I have had no need to attempt to do any major self development.

Me 1.0 was working fine. Anyway I moved here and decided to do something.

You know the thing I have been so excited about and I keep talking about but would not mention?

Yes- *drum roll*

I am learning to play the piano! LOL and taking pole dancing classes.

Now that its out there. Wheeeeeee! I have ALWAYS wanted to do both BUT growing up I did not have time and when I eventually had the time- ICAN came along. Anyway all things work together for your good because I moved here- found time, found a cheap ass tutor and started the classes.

As for pole dancing- It is what I was created for. I mean my knees and my wrists and MY THIGHS!!! are on fire- But it is such an amazing experience that I need to increase my core strength so I can hoist my self up the pole with ease.

Anyways that is pretty much the self development I have been doing- I was also training to run a marathon but since my knee went bust. Yah. Hopefully the 250 rope jumps I did today do not agitate it.

Classes are fine. My braids are fine( although I have been wondering how to wash them? Next weekend maybe? I should youtube how to wash braids without loosing some.

I hope you all have an amazing week! NEXT TOMORROW IS FRIDAY!!!


Monday, May 13, 2013

Draft

I saw this quote and it is so amazingly refreshing that I will need to blog about it/ build a post around it. But for now- Here is the quote- the post will come up sooner or later. Hopefully later than sooner. :)


Guys take so much longer to work stuff out – everything hits them harder,’ she said simply. ‘Women have so many shitty, annoying things to deal with every day. Smudging your manicure, beautiful shoes that hurt like a bitch, not fitting into your jeans – it’s constant disappointments. The worst thing that happens to a guy is his sports team loses. It makes sense that they lose their shit completely when things don’t go their way. They’re not used to it like we are.”

It was culled from one of the Lindsey Kelk I heart books- I LOVE chick lit AND Paulo Cohelo.

Anyways cookies for whoever can guess which one it came from!

That being said, hope you guys are donating o!

Sunday, May 12, 2013

For the Love of Breasts

Back drop

When I was 16, I discovered a lump in my breast. ( No I wont mention which). I would love to lie and saw I was not afraid and I was calm even though the doctor's had made me take numerous tests and said I was too young to have lumps. Even more importantly, he had scheduled my surgery two days before prom.
I was terrified. My mother could not be at the hospital with me because she had to go to work ( Bless her soul) so my aunt came along and waited the whole day with me... It was not cancerous BUT it was an experience that I would never ever want anyone to experience ever again.

Which is why when my friend Lima  MUA extraordinare told me she was supporting cancer research. I was interested. She is running the 5k on the 6th of July. This means a lot to her as her mum is actually a cancer survivor.

She is also trying to raise 1k GBP for cancer research.

This is the link http://www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/teamyakori

And if you are like me- and you are uncomfortable with your widows mite- She has assured me that no amount is actually too small.

So please get donating! :)

ANDDDDD if you were wondering how I managed to wear my strapless prom dress with all the plasters and stuff from my surgery? I BEGGED one of the student/ training doctors to push it a week forward. And if you have ever had to do business with LUTH ever you will know it was nothing short of a miracle that I was able to reschedule.

So please- Support Halima ( check out all her awesome work on her blog as well) BUT please remember No amount is too small and God loves a cheerful giver!


Thank you! and have an amazinggggggg week,
Remember be positive/ think happy thoughts.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

More Changes

You know how when things happen to you and you find yourself promising yourself that you will never change.

Like this thing would not affect me no matter what?

Yes?

But you wake up one day and find that except you are reluctant to learn from mistakes- You will keep getting burned.

Which explains why I have over 100 people on my bbm and I am scared shitless to talk to anyone because I have no idea where what I say will end up.

I never used to have this fear- I used to be okay with people I tell things telling their other friends sef.

I did not really mind.

Betrayal really screws you over. Now- I have no idea who I can talk to.

I guess I'll just write in my journal.

I do not like this person who is overtly secretive. I used to LOVE sharing things with the people in my life. NOW I am scared to carry out a conversation with anyone just so I know my shit is safe.

What kind of life is this?

Hopefully I'll over come this (maybe) irrational phase or maybe just like grief it is a phase when over coming betrayed confidence.

"The I want to trust you human beings- But ya'll are too fucked up for my liking" phase.

I think that is what it is.

Meanwhile I had the most delicious Friday night that I have had in a minute.

I saw Iron man three with my home girl and it was amazingggg- That movie left me so emotional.

Like.... * sigh* I was just screaming HAAAAAAYYYY through out. Plus I now even saw the  preview of fast and furious 6. I'm telling you guys that even if they make fast and furious up to 1000. I will watch.

I LOVE those action sequences and scenes. And let me point out that - the preview was FIRE!

After which we went to this house party and then ended up at this african shindig. House party was Ace. I think I am becoming a really good deejay. Don't ask me how.


Came home slept- woke up feeling the need to talk AND then boom this hits me.

Hope you guys have an amazing week- and remember, positive thoughts only! :)

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Changes

Coming here, I have learnt one thing, and that is the most important thing that must be taught to children in school- unfortunately it isn't.

Actually, I have learnt a good number of things. not one thing.

Like I have mastered the art of painting my right nails with my left hand and as a result discovered the need and importance of practice.

Its pretty much wash. Rinse.Repeat.

That is what life is. And the more you do this the better it gets. Only if you are doing the right things.

Moving here 5 ( gosh its 5 months already) months ago- I was ready to cut anyone who was in my path- I did not want to make friends, I was not here for the people. Basically I was checking for no one. I wanted to go home * sigh* I complained and lamented and murmured because you know, that's what I used to do when ever I did not get my way- lament and bad mouth and so one and so forth- again wash rinse repeat.

But in the last couple of months I think I have mastered the art of being the bigger person. Well not really the bigger person but learning to let things go. It doesn't matter.

The world I came from was about grudges and who said what and who did this and saying ALL sorts of things. And I do not mean that figuratively, I mean it literally. I used to say ALL sorts of things.

But coming here and being along- forced me to re-evaluate my lifestyle.

Back home it was okay because everybody knew how I was anyways. But here I did not have the validation of " everybody back home" knowing who I am and telling me who I am.

Coming here- I kind of lost myself. I was not sure who I was or who I wanted to be or who I wanted to be perceived as.

Along the line I found out who I wanted to become. And I am not there yet BUT I am definitely not where I used to be - or where I am coming from.

The person I am not looks back at the person I used to be and thinks- How did people stand me. I see people who are exactly the way I used to be- I smile and say a prayer for them - that they become better people because the world is an inherently better place when we become better people.

Coming here has taught me to rise above my emotions. There were days when I did NOT feel like going to school for no just cause. Just because I did not feel like it. But I learnt to rise above that feeling of not wanting to go- and drag myself there.

There were days I made appointments and had no plans to keep them but because I have learnt respect for people's time, I would go. And if I was going to be late- I'd call in and tell them.

I say this because a huge part of my former bosses problem with me was my perpetual late coming.

I am not saying I never go late for anything again O! I'm just saying I have started to manage my time and my life and the words that come out of my mouth a lot better.

If there is one thing I want you to take away from this post- It is that in times of adversity- say NOTHING.

In my low moments in the past because of pain- I have said things that I could do without saying, things that had no business coming out of my mouth anyways. and because your words are seeds and they create your world- and you have to live in that world- urgh Lets just say I know and do better now.

Do I will feel like throwing fits- HAAAAY GOD! all the time. Working with people would do that to you. However do I throw fits- not really no.

Do I still feel like going on shopping sprees- Hell YES! Do I- not really, not anymore- I realise I hardly need all the stuff anyway.

I feel like coming here has helped me to rediscover myself, find out weaknesses and strengths I did not even know I had and how to work/ deal with them.

I have no idea why I am writing this- Maybe someone else who moved away from home is feeling as lost as I did when I first came here- I want to tell you- that it is okay. To embrace the change and rediscover your self and if you find the grace and love of God like I did in the process. all well and good.

But whatever you do- Continue to strive to be a better person. Always.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Blindsided.

There are fewer things worse than knowing that you can not trust anyone.

Sort of opens your eyes to things you wish you never had to ever ever ever ever ever deal with.

But hey- C'est la vie.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Goal setting and divine encouragement

I do not run like a man running aimlessly- 1st Cor 9:26

Back drop.

When I was 12 I had a major surgery to correct a recurrent patella dislocation( which is as a result of your knees not being able to support your body weight) I had been experiencing in my left knee. It healed but left me with a scar that make me so self conscious- I was unable to wear anything that was above my knees.

Off course at 12, I did not finish therapy and I walk with a slight limp. That is fine- I have learned to live with it.

So Last week I decided to run the 5k marathon in Edinburgh. It is on the 13th of October and I decided while searching for a trainer to start intense exercises.

Off to the gym I went!

45 minutes of cardio and then some arm exercises I decided to get some work done on my knees and started doing some knee raises.

It was unusually painful but hey no pain no gain right? anyways I reduced the weight. Finished up and went to  lift weights for my arms and back.

I Finished that got on a mat to do some planks and stretches when I lay down and BOOM.
My knee gave way. I shit you not. blinding pain that was nothing like the pain I used to experience when I was 10 or 11.

Instantly- I just knew that 1- I had pushed myself too hard and 2- I might have lost too much weight.

Because I was ridiculously skinny as a child- I was told by my doctors that I needed to put on some weight and muscle so that my legs could support the rest of my body.

Since I decided to run the marathon, I had changed my eating patterns etc etc etc to healthier options and complex carbs for energy.

Anyway back to the pain. So I turned over and laid there till I stopped seeing stars and could make out the shapes of things around me. and did a couple of stretches.

I felt better after a few so I did some more.
On my way home- I ran into my class mate who I had never told about my gym runs ever- and he said " Ah even with your papers you are still going to the gym? this kind of dedication is serious o. Ah the man that marries you will enjoy with all the attention you you devote to certain things" he also invited me to his church to come for his worldwide communion service. Virtual cookies for anyone who can guess the name of said church.

Trust Nigerians to make EVERYTHING about marriage.
 All I sha took away from that I need to keep at it. Training for my 5k. Literally I feel like if I put my mind to it, my body will eventually co-operate.


Anyways that's that. I have completed my papers! * squeal*

I had no idea that they would turn me into an economics guru. With the help of Lekan obviously. LOL.

He literally had to help me interpret my regressions and tell me what each dependent variable meant. and then spell it out to me repeatedly. Lekan I can not thank you enough.

Anyways now I have to cut down 1k words- any economist that wants to actually look at the paper should get at me. 100 heads are better than one and all that. :)
My literary teacher said my writing has improved a thousand fold- she did not say thousand fold but her eyes said it. :)

hehe.

Have a good week guys!

Thursday, May 2, 2013

The danger of a single story

You see the problem with stereotypes is not that they are incorrect, It is that they are incomplete- Chimamanda Adiche.

When I come here to bash Yoruba men, consistently ( i might add) I do it sarcastically and more often than not because I have enough ammunition to come to that conclusion.

However, I do not think it is logical for any reader to read 10 out of maybe 400 posts I have on here and confidently type out how " they understand I have reason to hate Yoruba people"

Which does not add up- as you see because I am Yoruba. I may not speak the language OR understand it or like the men BUT it does not make me any less a Yoruba person. I have Yoruba friends. Even more amusing I have my friend zone FULL of Yoruba men as friends.
Most importantly being Yoruba does not disqualify me from bashing Yoruba men.

I would have said it is my blog and I can bash who I want to bash- but I am a changed person.

Which is why I am confused. In my attempt to write satire, someone springs out from the wood works and is telling me how they understand my need to hate Yoruba people.

I am confused because no one forced you to read the article. The title was clear " Do not marry a Yoruba man" - If you are a yoruba man AND that offended you, Maybe you should not have read the post- Is all I'm saying.

The problem with the internet is that people are only able to draw conclusions from what they can see- which more often than not is incomplete.

So to my Yoruba reader who I do not know and does not know me- Your anger might be justified ( note I am using the word anger here loosely) because I do not know your story. I have no idea IF you might have lost out on the woman of your dreams solely because you are Yoruba. And so I can not honestly take anything you have said seriously.

Well maybe except the half hearted compliment you threw in about me writing properly when I am not bashing Yoruba people.

So thank you for reading my posts. And to all my other readers. Thank you.

However the posts are a 2D representation of my person and not my whole story.

If I have 10 out of 400 posts running down Yoruba men that is pretty much 2.5% . I'm not a mathematician BUT that figure strongly suggests that 10 posts are simply not enough to draw a conclusion on.


Let me also just throw out there that I am still blogging on my other blog. I know, I know. Now I have two. :)

I was going to come here and share my newest undertaking BUTTTT I had to sort this out. However once I finish my papers- I'll come right to it.x



Completion

I completed my photography class. I am so proud of myself. I keep looking at the photos like. Gosh. Thank you so much Canon. And Lek...