Merry Christmas

 One thing about me- I'm not leaving ANYTHING to chance, Like I will plan my way around anything and everything and if things fall apart last minute I'd be like ah- God your turn, and he is like- I thought you'd never ask. and Boom - all things go my way.

All of this is to say I am having a SMASHING christmas szn. Obviously not as fabulous as what I'd have had in lagos, BUT this is def one for the books.

I have seen the christmas lights two cities away, had dinner and drinks with friends, then ended up at a bar in a casino and met the loveliest babe who promised to take us under her wings.

Then had a christmas party that was so much fun, we were literally the last to leave. It has been such a glorious run, I wanna thank me for making these plans and following through.

Merry Christmas to everyone, My skin is currently in shambles, for reasons best known to it, honestly at this point I don't know again- I'm handing it over to God because wetin?

Alsoooooo, my books I ordered black friday from lagos actually came, might spend tomorrow reading either one of them or maybe the alchemist.

One of the wildest things about moving here just feels like we have given ourselves permission to live the lives we want and now it is beginning to enter all the other area's of our lives as well. Crazy.

Another wild thing is- how much adjustment it takes to settle into a new country financially. And I don't mean like money to move, I mean learning the credit system, figuring out how investments work here, knowing what is a great deal on rates, optimizing for affordability in a city that thrives on information that is not easily accessible. And also knowing the opportunity cost of many things.

I'm also realizing my ability to get things gone- expertly, and its strange how my employer realizes this.

Perhaps I should really start looking for another job.

All of this is to say that as I'm sat in this chair, writing and looking at my foil decorations, I feel so happy, so thankful, so grateful that what is infront of me is soooo much better than what is left behind.

Merry Christmas everyone. May we all experience joy & happiness unlimited this szn!

And on the fourth day of Christmas...

I give you one of my most recently discovered treasures.

German machinery tuned to the finest possible specifications.

Mr Kodjoe, Boris. Butt Naked. In the real husbands of Hollywood.

And here is a clip to prove it.

Don't Worry. You can not see anything.

Although little is left to your imagination.

Christmas came early this year ladies.xxx

Side bar- This show is HILARIOUS!!!! I can not get over how good it is.

On the third day of christmas

I am a 90's baby at heart.

I love the black leather. the over exaggerated baby hair, the skinny brows.

The powerful music with horrible music videos but well meaning lyrics.

I love 90's music*.

Anyway, I found a video that embodies all these traits and is my theme song for December.

Tell me if you want me to

give you all my time,

I want to make it good for you.

because December is the month for taking charge.

* I love the 2000's music too.

Side bar, a hearty congratulations to my mother. Today she was her investiture as the President of the society of women accountants of Nigeria.

I love you mummy. But why do you have to raise the bar so damn high?

On the 2nd day of Christmas.

This weekend had me experiencing several bouts of nostalgia.

In waves and waves.

In the spirit of home sickness, nostalgia and the reason for the Christmas season- Jesus,

I give you:

Abo Abo- Volume 1.

To douse all confusion. I'm part Isoko* and this track has been a staple in my Sunday mornings as well as car rides with my mother and summer holiday's in Warri and everything else.

It was one of the foremost gospel productions from the Niger delta and my mother played the Shit( pardon my french) out of this CD.

I speak Isoko passably, but can sing along to all the songs in this production.

Ps: Abo means hands in Isoko, so basically he is asking you to clap. Also they are subtitled.

Note that the production of Niger Delta gospel tracks have improved significantly.

This was a pioneer.

Enjoy.

pss: This is just part a of a 5 part production.

*Isoko- is a tribe from the Niger Delta where my mother hails from, and I claim occasionally when I want to get out of the garb of being Yoruba from time to time.

Read occasionally in the above statement to mean- ALL THE DAMN TIME.

12 Days of Christmas.

This is the most amazing thing!
I love Christmas.
I love December- I get to a review of my year and I get to spend it with family.

Plus I have like 10000 weddings.
Now I'm not sure if the 12 days start from today.
But if it does, Here is my day one present to you my readers.

!2 days of Christmas. Straight, No chasers.

This is GOLD!!!!!!!!

It makes me cheese so hard!

1:59 is my best part

Christmas and all its extra's

Christmas has come and gone.

and work has come.

And it was fantastic, actually a lot more fantastic than i imagined.

Although my mother was away and i had the hugest fight ever with the lover that AM, it turned out well.

One of the lovers friends actually sent us both a gift.

weird, he addressed the cards and shit to " the lover and Ore"

toushing stuff.

on the 26th my fat friend Oyinkan invited me to a beach parry.

which was good as well.

i also had a brief run in with a boy " who just got back"

all im going to say about the issue, is give me a Lagos boy any day.

These i just got back boys have clearly lost the plot or maybe they weren't even included in the plot in the first place.

but the conversation we had was eye opening.

We then went to chef's in the park, My friend fregene was cooking, but by the time i got there food had finished.

I saw friends and lots of people who also " just got back"

i swear these people are everywhere.

and to be honestly it is mildly irritating.

But then if you have spent the whole year shopping and saving to show your baffs to your lagos counter-parts in Dec, you wouldnt have a problem prancing around every lagos event.

But thats besides the point.

On 27 i took my siblings to lunch at Protea westwood in Ikoyi. the food was okay, but i found an insect in my chap man after almost finishing it.

although they offered me a new one, and said i shouldnt pay for the old one ( Like as if i had any plans on paying), i still couldnt bring myself to drink it.

i also got the protea deal of dealdey. i tell you people,

dealdey is probably the reason im a fattie now, after the lover off course.

after lunch my friend "aldmoni" came to scoop my self to the TNC3 thingy.

myself then turned into my sister- who was so fucking bored at home, and Aisha, who was also bored at hers and came to mine.

this will definitely be the last TN anything i would be attending ever.

it was basically a twitter argument but in real- life.

On the upside Itunes got the card of the security assistant.

if that can be said to be upside.

Instead of going home, i decided to have some people over at mine,

was a riot.

after wining and dining and showing off my kitchen skills, we just talked and it was good.

at 11pm- everyone faded, i just up-ed and went to the lovers place.

And i just realised as i am writing this, that i haven"t been out all xmas long.

like over night out.

work starts tomorrow, i think i would kick start my day with the gym.

and Yinka and Eneni, i think i got out of my groove and shit so i wont be needing that cat. :P

by the way, i think one of the greatest dis-service anyone can do to themselves is not follow thier intuition.

especially women.

i have a kick ass intuition, and i follow mine daily, sometimes i think its the spirit of God telling me what to do.

i need to draft my new years resolution.

2 things on my mind.

weight loss

and masters application.

i've accepted the fact that the Lover is not going to come to school with me anytime soon.

and a tiny part of me is excited about being in an LDR, surely that tiny part is crazy.

but i have to go to school irrespective of what his life choices are- and i cant stay waiting for him to align with me.

what would really piss me off however, would be IF after my one year there, he then decides to go to school.

- that would be major irreconcilable difference yo.

I also want to give a huge shout out to Deyo. for xmas.

Bubble gum pink nails

Usually im the red talon jezebel-esque wielding nails typa girl.

But in the spirit of xmas i decided to cut it short AND paint it pink.

think nicki minaj pink.

luckily for me, my nails are beautiful so it came out looking nice and shii.

but i didnt realise how nice it actually looked until i was making eba for my mum

and i stopped. they looked gorge.

so i used style to delegate plate washing to my brother so that the nails wont shaa on time. lol

My sister is coming home finally!

Im excited! i missed her, im also worried about the logistics.

what car would be available, sleeping arrangements, wardrobe space.

ive gotten so used to having my own space, i cant believe i have to share a room again.

this is motivation to go and do that masters

of which the school keeps emailing me. unfailingly by feb i should have gotten it out of the way.

my 1st xmas in lagos in over 10 years.

mixed feelings, because i really dont have a clique of friends just people i talk too, i cant make concrete plans for xmas.

the lover has to work through the holiday- even though his mum invited me to thier family breakfast- sidebar, i think that is waaay too much sha.

but since my own mother wont be here- i really should have followed her to the village to be fair to my self- never again.

AND my students have been released for holiday, even though they didnt want to leave, they are sooo cute.

although they banged the 1st test i gave them, they are improving.

today i was looking through a students note AND she wrote my name and the english translation.

i was so tickled about the whole thing.

i was telling debo- my darling friend- who uses me as a make shift girlfriend minus the sex when his real gf is outta town, ab out how this xmas is gonna really suck and if he would be so kind as to find me a private jet so i can go to benin on sunday morning.

that would be nice.

so it turns out a number of people in my fitness groups have body magic, i have been saying i will buy it since, but - to be honest to myself, i really dont need it. except its a gift i would continue slaving at the gym. although shapers would be nice.

turns out this xmas is gonna see me with a lot of free time on my hands.

AND i have 3 store counts to attend too.

sometimes, i think i should be a super model or sthg equally glamorous. i feel like im wasting away here inthis 9-5 rat race.

i read the bobo omotayo book, it seemed okay, except i had read most of the articles on BN. however i agree with his views on lagos life.

lagos life has a box and its impossible for me to fit into it.

i think its because im not class concious enough.

and i know this is a good thing, because my mother told me so.

speaking of my mother when i gave her the eba to eat, she didnt complain, which meant it was ace.

so i pushed my luck for a compliment and said, ahn you didnt say anything about the eba.

oh its perfect she replied.

you'll make whoever you marry very proud.

My mother makes me feel like a princess, like everybody is undeserving of me.

sometimes( in minute nano seconds) i wish she could pick out my husband for me.

then i snap out of that.

speaking of which do we all hae that opposite sex friend who can say shit to you and get away with it?

I have this friend we grew up together, although he dated my sister, we still speak once in a while, but when he calls me conversation is so great its amazing.

yay to old friends that just pick up where we left off. its just so easy with him.

im guessing its because we have known each other forever.

i hate stupid old men that strip me naked with thier eyes in the gym.

and i hate the young men that do it as well.

yup this means i have resumed going to the gym.

i swear i need someone to kick my ass more often.

back to the lover's mother inviting me for Christmas breakfast, im kinda undecided.

My mum thinks i should go,as does everyone else, including the lover,who is going to play that its so rude to turn down my mother's invitation card.

Festus asked me why i stopped tweeting about the lover, he asked if it was maturity.

what i heard was him fishing for gist assuming the lover and i have split.

i mean know its paranoid to think thats what he was on about, but i mean he was out of town for two weeks, out of sight, out of tweet content.

besides i had my students keeping me busy so i tweeted about them.

you know whats weird, compliments from people who dont care about/ probably wont ever see again making you feel good.

especially drivers- dont judge me.
if i accost the for wanting to hit me, they will now say, how i wan take jam fine girl like you.
lol that makes my day.

Dealdey is amazing.

i will gist you people what they did for me. i was touched.

Good customer relations will get you everywhere.

especially for someone like me who is rude.

and one more thing, i wish i had "friends" coming in this Christmas.

all the people have their own friends coming in an have abandoned me.

steph is off to SA with her best friend.

I really enjoy my company, i would write and read and shit, but Xmas is family / loved ones related. sadly, Mummy is travelling AND lover is working.

sister will return and run off to her boyfriend - in Jesus name, because God knows i need the space.

brothers girl he has been chasing forever girlfriend is in town so he would be with her, and all that.

and still dont have a christmas dress, but i am grateful i have a roof over my head and people i love irrespective of where they are.

plus i won a skinny belt AND eneni promised to send me a cat- because im now an old lady.

Good times!

anyways incase i dont blog again till after xmas

Happy Christmas. and a Prosperous New year

I wish all of you,

Love from the one you love

Light from PHCN and

Laughter from jokes which you arent the butt of.

Happy holidays.

happy lives here.

The lover is back.

and all is well with my world.

I also told him i teach and he keeps teasing me about it.

I also did not realise how much i missed him till i saw him.

he also added a ton of weight. I may just have to put my foot down on his weight loss attempts.

that being said, i had a delish weekend.

Nothing but watch games, eat chinese and watch tv with the lover.

I really really really like december.

December reminds me of when i met the lover, and sneaking out at 12 midnight to return at 5am just to listen to really good music.

I have one of those weird ass Love stories.

weird but good.

Im just lying here and being happy if there is anything like that.

it also helps that im shopping online as well.

December in Lagos is always sooo packed. P on P on P.

urgh hate it. wanted to go to my village but work said no.

actually work didnt say no.

along the line i just didnt go.

Im also worried about having to go do a masters, I went to see my sister in April

and she burst into tears when we were leaving.

and then i started crying as well.

thats how much we must have missed each other. and we arent even friends.

talk less of the people you actually like.

I have no idea how i would cope for a year away from all the people i love, mummy, my brother, my lover.

i get teary eyed thinking about it.

i must device a coping mechanism. MUST.

anyways must stop thinking about it.

My friend is giving me a birthday present tomorrow.

Im sooo excited. i cant wait to see what it is, shoes? pants? clothes? a sheer blouse?

i also need to get my hair did. however since i have told all my office people thaty my hair is yansh length im just going to save my self the drama and wait till we close for the year.

ALSO- its Uwana's birthday on Saturday Im too excited about the whole thing.

You'd think she was my child.

I still cant believe Ope has a kid and is married.

Everything is moving so fast.

and everyone is changing so fast.

and im just lying still in the middle of all of it, being happy.

^_^