Pages

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Fingers. Hair


I did not want to write about fingers because they bring back the most delicious thoughts of my most salacious activities in the worst possible way. But fret not, I have not done porn yet.

I have the most complex relationship with my hair and fingers.

In that I Love fingers running through my hair.

But lately I haven't wanted anyone running fingers through my hair.

Or anything really ( I may be lying- but who cares?)

I recently found out that I liked holding hands and  linking fingers with people.

Which is truly strange because I actually hate leaving my hands in people's palms?

Lots of things are so strange these days.

My hair is the shortest I've had it since birth and now I'm liking holding hands.

For someone who is swirling in confusion, I quite like it.

for the first time in  a long time, I made..

Never mind what I made.

Just don't run your hands through my hair anymore.

Because that ship has sailed, and left you behind.

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Villain. Sister. Drunk


What makes someone a Villain?

Is it the bad things they do to the protagonist in a story?

Or is it the fact that they never get to tell their own story?

My relationship with my only sister has been for lack of a better word stressful.

And sometimes I wonder if that makes her the villain in my life's story.

She constantly moves my things around; she takes what I specifically tell her NOT  to take,

But I do not think it makes her a bad person, because villains are not one dimensional.

They are living, breathing sometimes drunk people who do shit to stress you out.



Friday, November 25, 2016

Heart


#HonestyHour

I'm going to talk about the gift and curse of feeling things a bit too deeply, and how I embraced

Step 1. I read Paulo Cohelo's the way of the bow and the four agreements by Don miguel Ruiz.

Lots of people say it's fluff reading.

But both of them taught me to not take anything personal.

In realising it's not you, Its literally them, there is some form of peace and you find that there is some space in your heart for things that truly matter.

Like cholesterol from the Steak I could have been eating this afternoon if I decided to play truant AND not even come into work today.

But old habits die hard.

Step 2. Read step 1, Drink some red wine and ask your self why?
-why am I so upset?
-What is triggering these emotions that run so deep?
-Do I ever plan to address these issues?


Step 3: Honesty has a way of bringing you peace.

And it gives you ease of mind, I have always always always been a fan of love that is erratic and butterfly filled and just crazy stupid passionately drowning.

Always.

Because what else is there to do than to put your heart to work, pumping blood at a rate that feels like your heart will burst?

Suggestion: Nothing


In as much as I feel the crazyness of the love that is erratic, I can swear to you that you need your head.

even better put pen to paper and write.

Write out what you want AND then tell your heart to do what you want.

Step 4:

Be steeped in it, as an unashamed lover girl, y'all know by now that I'm a lean mean fronting machine.

I stopped fronting. Going all in ensured that I put my back and best into ventures and I was able to pull out when said ventures stopped serving me.

There is literally nothing else to be done.

Your best was not good enough.

And your heart makes peace with that fact and lets you have peace.




Thanksgiving

I am generally thankful person.

I try my best not to grumble and I always try to see the best of every situation.

But this year has been TRYING, for lack of a better word, so when thanksgiving came around and I

was out of Lagos I just kneewwwww in my heart of hearts that I had to host a friendsgiving shindig.


So quick shout out to everyone through who came at such short notice.

It was truly a perfect night.

My heart is full and I am bursting with pleasure at the thought of the memories of last night.

Like today I just remembered something and burst into like loud laughter. more like cackle because

y'all know I am truly reckless.

Debo called me today and said he was about to file an official complaint against whoever was

holding  me in Abuja.

Debo that would be my credit alert at Month end for real.

But Truly Truly Truly the blood shared on the battle field of life is superior to the water of the womb.


Also did the most lavish mannequin challenge video and it was perfect...

I think my life is pretty perfect now tbh, and that makes me happy.

What are you thankful for this year?

Thursday, November 24, 2016

Bones

I remember watching the Bone Collector on DBN's NightShift.

( I just realised I might be a collectors Item)

I actually know people that did not meet DBN.

Bones

When things grow we never pay attention.- Well I don't.

Because  I'm carried away, with sinew with muscle

With flesh.

With Blood

And everything but bones.

Lately I am finding a new found love for Bones.

Solid, dependable and without wax.

And also because I am finding the act of stripping down

to the bone of certain matters therapeutic.

Like picking at scabs,

We should leave to heal but we do not any way.

Because we are all a bit crazy.

Well I'm finding that to be true about me,


Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Teeth

and you take a bite of reality,

And you begin to chew, slowly ,

Savouring the favors

And just enjoying the textures in your mouth,

Then a sharp sensation, because it's not pain

It's a jolt.

It is exactly what you feel with you bite on foil with an amalgam filling.

Except it's 10 times worse, and then it hits you,

You either have to spit out reality

Or you lose a tooth.

Guess which went?

(hint: I have 30 teeth left, but I'm chewing till the wheels come off)

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Ash

When I saw this prompt all I could think of was this quote




Ashes.

I like the beginning of things.

I'm not a slow starter so I put my back into most things when I start.

I'm the self starter that smoulders like coal.

I tell myself , you do not want flames, smouldering is better, the residue is more solid.

Then I kick in, and start stoking the fire.

Some olive branches of affection serve as tinder.

My best behavior as oxygen.

Then flames. Bright. High. Hot

Fiery Red.

In this moment, I am all of a sudden disinterested in this fire.

And flames change to blue.

They say the flame that burns twice as bright burns out in half the time.

They never lied.

Sometimes, I see embers and  last minute I try to revive the fire.

But every time,

Every time, all that is left , is a pile of ash.

And what else is left to do with ash, than to rise like a phoenix?

You tell me.