Other things

This weekend was good.

It was long and filled with me doing abso fucking lutely nothing.

and I loved it.

In my new obsession- List making of pro's and cons.

Top five reasons why I want to lose weight.

5- New clothes. Drop sizes buy new clothes-  because slimfitting clothes is soooo last year.

4- So everyone at the gym fawns over me and reminds me how I am so beautiful, I shouldn't be there - because I am an attention whore.

3- For comments like this " OH my God, are you losing weight"- still an attention whore

2- To enable me respond to above comments like this " I'd Better be!, with all the hours I'm spending in the damn gym!"- even though I'm probably the most IN-consistent person that goes there.

1- So that when I parallel park perfectly (which I do perfectly 10 times out of 10) and I open the door and the space is too tiny, I can squeeze myself out of the car-  as opposed to climbing out through the passenger seat totally gracelessly. Not Like it has ever happened to me, I just see people doing shit like that.




Top 5 reasons why I hate driving.

5- People see you trafficating* and speed up, or worse flash their headlamps almost as if telling you not to think about it. and I'm thinking Nigga please, I do not even trust your brakes enough to risk this.

4- Merging Lanes- If you have ever been in traffic from third mainland bridge and entering kingsway road.
five  lanes into two lanes you are bound to encounter idiots.

3- Horns- Nigerians are constantly in a competiton they are unaware off. Who can toot thier horn the loudest. Both figuratively and literally. Like Nigga the light is red, can you stop leaning on the damn horn.

2- Okada Men- These are the vermin of roads. On the food chain of vehicles, they rank lower than pedestrians. And it doesn't help that they drive like they have 9 lives. until you hit one of them, and all the relatives swarm you like flies following shit.

1- Traffic- In Lagos, Traffic is the bane of my existence. Everywhere I go, Traffic abounds. I. Can. Not. fucking. DEAL!

Oh I got promoted on friday- Only in my firm would they post promotion list, at 6:30pm on a friday, when COB is 5pm.  Just screams sketchy. Anyway, I did not get the double promotion I wanted. So I was pretty disappointed.

I told my mother and she replied " he makes everything beautiful in his own time"- Super Woman stance yo!

I did not exactly feel better, just not as bitter as I should have been. I was bitter because I had pretty much finished spending double promotion salary next month in my head  deserved it.

Anyways- What has been up with you people?

I hate being so indecisive. What would I do to my hair?