Monday, November 28, 2011

Suicide

Its a sad thing,

even sadder when people begin to blame themselves for what they had no control over.

One of the major things ive learnt - and it hasnt been easy -is that

YOU cant control everything.

There are people who you give your all over and over and over too- and they still give you shit.

once you realize that it has nothing to do with you- its liberating.

But some people feel like they must not let anyone down,

some ( like myself) feel the need to be perfect.

and these pressures get us no where.

expect setting ourselves up for failure.

I mean previously i had stated that i had learned to not dwell on gratitude from people

This is one of those things- you can clean the shit of a dog and the dog will still come and shit there tomorrow.

it takes the grace of God to help you continue cleaning that repeatedly-

however once you learn that - when you are tired you can stop cleaning that shit, and nothing would happen.

Then you are on the path to liberation.

I still believe the world revolves around me- BUT i know that if i dont do things a certain way,

the world would keep revolving. and i have no control over that.

Sometimes, its best to let go and let God.

Now while i have never been suicidal, i can understand why some people will be.

Life gets frustrating, you hate your job, you hate men that constantly hit and run, you hate that you are stuck in traffic for insane hours everyday.

But it gets better- if You hold on.

There is a God and a turning point.

I have bad days- i have lapses and bouts of depression, and people go about thier business, the world doesnt stop.

it is up to me to reach out and say- OMG im drowing, i cant deal.

or i just fucking cant.

and there help is.

No one is all knowing, or self sufficient. But the sooner you realize that there is help if you reach out. the better for you.

"There’s nothing cowardly about suicide, and there’s nothing courageous about it, either."

Les floyd.


You can read the rest of this post here


and here is his own personal suicide story


Lets try to be there for each other.

after all, no man is an island.

and not every one is as strong as you.

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