I have become an IT guru- anyone who disagrees will just have to disagree. ( I would have said hug transformer but you know new year and all.)
Got a new I hated you but I like you now speech today.
and I'm just girl girrrl please you did not even know me- why did you not like me.
She said and I quote " I do not know, you just seemed so sit in front-y and ask all the questions"
I said Fred sits in front and asks all the questions- Do you not like Fred?
she said - oh she likes fred, BUT WE DO THE SAME THINGGG!
I did not say that though- I just said " well I did not know you and so I was indifferent, but now I know you, I like you"
She defensively added how she wasn't the only one who doesnt/ didnt like me.
I told her- Its okay, you are not the only one who doesn't know me.
And she said- are you not bothered that people do not like you.
Me: Not since I my Js2 In Queens college.
Her: Why? Me: Because I do not want to know everyone. relationships are investments I give my 100% to if I have no interests in investing in you 100%, I'd rather not be half baked.
F( my other friend) aka my cupcake: Yah Ore says relationships drain her-
Me: They replenish me too- I do not want relationships where I can not put in 100% and 2nd where I do not trust the value you will be adding to my life.
Her: So analytical, urgh. Me: you'll be fine and we moved on.
I am beginning to wonder why people are obsessed with being liked. I know I might seem contrary but what is the use of 10000 people liking you? Like you aren't running for Student Union president or anything- What do you really do with the likes.
I strongly believe I can make everyone like me if I tried- But to be the honest the work put in just outstrips the benefit a thousand times over ( hello- Economic analytical thinking in terms of cost benefit analysis!)
That's just me personally, If I like you and you are my friend- I will go the extra mile for you. If I do not know you- a lackluster hi- is what you'll get a good day- if you don't like it, then you don't like it. Life isn't primary school- everyone does not have to like you.
I feel like as I go along and build my little cocoon of people I will study with, shop with, go on lunch dates with etc etc in the next one year here( sometimes referred to as friends), I will be getting that a lot. I hated you when I did not know you- and now that I know you, I can not get enough of you.
And even if I already knew at the back of my mind how I would not deviate from this tried and tested method of making friends ( AND I DID TRY- I was smiling and making mindless chatter with people my instincts said No to, - and I am now stuck with trying to shake off), I mean I get an A for effort.
But really, why change the lock if it isn't broken?
Enough of that- I am pleased with those I have around me- Trinidad, lebanese, Ugandian, Nigerian.
And for now- these work.
How is it that this morning before church I was attempting to study and in one of the many numerous breaks I took, I ended up downloading spotify on my iphone and searched out Maxwell.
After listening to Pretty wings( which is my absolute Favorite btw), I skipped songs until I came across " Fist full of tears". Until today I had never heard it, but I think I have fixed that, I have probably listened to it more times than Maxwell recommended.
Cus I, I go insane
trying to keep you from
losing your mind
Open your eyes,
See whats in front of face
Save me my fist full of tears.
Hope you all have a good week, and while I am at it- I saw this bible passage Ecc 5:15- Basically reminding us that while we toil day and night we must remember that we came into the world naked with nothing, and that is how we shall leave. People I know there is work, and school and a million and one things to do on your to do list- but this week, try to make out time to smell the flowers you know? Take out time to chill and drink juice.