Sunday, March 10, 2013

Mothers day and anger management

Its saddening to know that when I am helpless I STILL DISSOLVE INTO A PUDDLE OF TEARS!

I could swear I had become more patient, less angry and more on top of things.

Maybe I am hard on myself, but I am so upset with myself for getting upset.

and then ranting about it on twitter. No I wont delete the tweets, I'll leave them there to remind myself the next time I want to flip or lose my coool- that you seem retarded and crazy and irrational.

Thats a lie- My reaction was perfectly normal. If I was a 12 year old.

I do not like being angry. I make the shittiest decisions and then regret it afterwards.

Well what happened?

Today is Mothers day, and since I can not be home to be with superwoman, I sent her flowers.


Well I called the flower company in ikoyi, paid fro the flowers and for delivery and let that rest

I was even extra proud I did not hassle anyone to help me pick up or anything like that- I just you know- handled my business, neat nice and wrapped that bad boy up.

I mean I'm up till 6 am so when I eventually wake up by 12pm, My sister messages me- that the flowers did not come- In my sleepy state, I'm like wo its lagos, I'm sure it will come.

and I go back to bed.

I wake up semi- finally by 3pm and I message my sister, THERE ARE STILL NO FLOWERS!!!!!

By now I getting mlidly upset. My sister is "lol-ing" on bbm because it is supposed to be funny.

So I do the only logical thing to do- I call the number- OFF COURSE IT IS SWITCHED OFF!

I message Mr Lover- hey call this number, tell them you are from me, ask them what happened, Please?

He gets back to me- after a life time ( 10 minutes) Bad news, They are closed- Turns out " THEY DID NOT GET THE ADDRESS FOR THE DELIVERY( which I sent 3 times)"

Okay- Shebi you will call me, email me or something IF  you have received payment BUT YOU DO NOT HAVE THE ADDRESS.

I do the next logical thing- Go to the gym. ( which in hind sight was so stupid- I hurt everywhere)

I am already wailing by now- 40 mins on the treadmill, I have calmed down a little.

I call my mum, I apologize for screwing mothers day up and I promise to make it up to her.

her reply - Oh its fine
Me- why are you whispering?
her- I am at a meeting, calm down stop crying I will call you later.

Then off course I start crying again and start ranting on twitter. And people are offering solutions.


Like this is someone who has done EVERYTHING for me, since I can not afford to give her the world- I settle for flowers AND THEY STILL DO NOT COME.

I  am Livid- and I push myself too hard at the gym.

45 mins later- the business owner calls me- ( turns out my lover found her other number and explained the situation to her)- So she calls and apologizes and says she did not get the address and that the flowers will get there asaply.

And now- I don't even want the wretched flowers- I want a refund.

I mean WHO runs a business like that? So if I did not call you that you haven't gotten my address- I mean I have PAID YOU RIGHT????

So I finish up at the Gym- which in my fit of anger I decided to wear shorts to, sans a scarf- I get outside and off course, only naturally  ITS SNOWING.

Like everything that can go wrong- just decided to go wrong.

I mean my legs are freezing, and I realise I have no food to eat so I had to go food shopping IN THE SNOW WITH SHORTS.

Off course- any body in the right frame of mind would have gone home and changed- But I just stormed off to the shop and realised that

1- I did not have a shopping bag
2- a market list

soooooooooo off course I spent an unnecessary amount of money.
and I had to carry everything home ALONE in the cold in my gym shorts.

I'm home looking at all the shopping I did,with body pains and I am just so upset at how the whole day turned out.


I mean, I should have calmed down since this probably wont matter in 6 months- But right now, It matters and I'm pissed and angry and still crying.

Right now- Things are on top of me. and right now- I HATE IT.

anyways happy mothers day to all the amazing mothers who have done the best for their children, no amount of flowers would ever be able to show you how amazing, strong and beautiful you are.

we appreciate you- The damn flower company just doesn't want you to know how much


Needless to say- This is the last time I'm ever ever ever going to buy flowers ever in Nigeria. ever.


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I keep getting little signs that maybe I am on the right track, Just maybe,