Wednesday, July 5, 2017

5/7/17

I think my boss is inappropriate.

Which isn't unusual. This is Nigeria.

But inappropriate in that he is giving me marital advice and we are not close like that.

Today in a group of people he said if I married you I would be flogging you in the house.

Interestingly enough I wasn't livid.

Just slightly amused because I'm never going to marry you what is the point.

And it dawned on me that I really really really might not get the range back.

Took a trip to clear my mind and now I'm even more lost with a shorter fuse than I can survive with.

But it means I'm not giving myself a headache over hypothetical situations that are never ever ever going to come to pass.

My favorite past time used to include doing that, building situational castles in the sky, but I learnt quickly that what you think is what you get so, I switched those thoughts up positive real quick.

And now life is good.

Sunday by the pool at Intercontinental with T,

T "So the boy from thursday"
Me: OMG he is 24444!
T: and?
Me: I don't know if sugar mummy is something I want to dabble in
T: He is going to be really smooth, if that he him at 24, his game is only going to get stronger
Me: Yeah definitely. but not for me
T: Gabrielle Union swears differently

*swats him*

My old friends have started throwing shade about T and I, which is really interesting because they couldn't be farther from what it is.

Same way my friend in Miami thought Yorubae was my boyfriend.

Interesting thing I've noticed is that everyone has started asking me if I am dating?
It's weird because I'm not.

Inappropriate boss was telling me today how he wishes he was 35 and could do life over again. Said he got jilted at 26 and carried it with him forever so he went on a sleeping around spree and then just couldn't stop and got married but still wishes he stopped to get to know people.


And it occurred to me that is why I was becoming celibate.

IssaRaunchySexRabbitLifestyle was becoming a tad too comfortable for me and not like it's a bad life (seeing as I enjoy(ed),- hopefully, it thoroughly), It always ends with people who aren't me getting hurt and that is not who I am ( okay maybe it is but I'm trying to be better).

And also because I was reading my journal and I remembered that someone told me that I break everything I come in contact with ( Fake news by the way, I'm a total healer).

I'm swearing off casual sex till I find the range to actually enter into a committed lets see what we are doing anyway type thing.

I also harbor this really strange fear where I'm not going to be able to pick someone because- who keeps bringing more I've had too many type thing.

And It's really strange because - How can I be afraid that I won't be able to chose someone, when I know a problem most people have is literally the opposite?

But you know what?

Problems are problems.

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