Lagos reminds me of the madness in those end of the world movies will smith is so damn famous for.

Except in that in Lagos as the world is falling apart, people are going about their business like its nothing.

Everyday we witness accidents that Hollywood block buster action sequences want to be when they grow up and  we just shrug, probably mutter God abeg o and continue on our merry way.

There is a method to the madness in Lagos, which seems to defy all logic. But it works.

And if it aint broke, why you tryna fix it?

In the last week, Lagos has taught me one very important lesson, all is fair in love, war and parking spaces. Because of your car can fit in, and no one stops you, then you can park there, even when you know its wrong- especially when you know better.

Because that must be the only reason someone who has complete control of his faculties will park and  block the road like they are chasing him from his mother's village.

side bar- why do they always chase from only mothers village.

Enough with the complaining- I love Lagos, fuel scarcity and all.

When I decided to not drink any more alcohol or soda anymore- what I forgot to factor in was that in Lagos, going to " drinks" is an actual event. Not as a date or as a rendevous but just because you do not want to stay at home. and you have loose change. Drinks become an option.

That really isn't the problem except Nigerians or should I say lagosians make the weakest mocktails on the face of God's green earth.

You might as well set your cool N2000 on fire.

I have taken to drinking water in large amounts.

I have another holiday 2nd week in april so I need to be bikini ready.

As always, I am dragging my feet, But God willing, I will do better going forward.

I have eaten rice only twice this week and I have drank soda zero times.

I am pleased with my progress.

I am not pleased with being my mother's errand girl.

That is a lie, since I spent a lot of time with her in London, I have gradually become aware of her, her sacrifices and how amazing her work ethic is.

In my recurrent job search, I have found that she is highly revered among her peers and industry people.

I think it is a shame that I am just making this realization. I screech so much about leaning in every damn day and just 2 feet away from me my mother is breaking glass ceilings everyday and not just leaning into the table but flipping the damn thing over every chance she gets.

This mini praise session seems valid as Sunday happens to be mothers day.

So mummy- I know you do not read my Blog and I hope to God you never do.
But I am proud of you. the woman you are and the choices you have made and the amazing life you have given us.

So this mother's day- seeing as I am almost a mother myself* I actually finally understand what you mean when you say " when you make your own money use it to buy what you want"

I am thankful to God for blessing you so immensely. for how selflessly you treat everyone and how much you want to see everyone succeed.

If everyone in the world was like you, the world would be a much better place.

I love you. Not because you are my mother, But because you are THE ideal mother.

emosh trance over.

Anyone else here get labelled user?

Nope, just me then. And the worst part, I do not bother to conceal that I might be taking undue advantage of said usee.

Some of us are wired without fucks to give.

Lagos- The  Your Queen has landed

* I am not pregnant or expecting a child or a dog or a cat.


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