Sunday, December 16, 2012

Prostitution

I've never given prostitution much thought. I'm usually on the fence on that issue. Let's face it, its not like my morals are any better than the average sex worker. And if you think about it, there a lot worse things people out there do for money anyways. So yeah, prostitutes, whatever...
That was the way I thought about it. Please pay attention to the use of past tense in that statement. Because I've changed my stance on this issue. I'm now 100% behind prostitutes and what they stand for, (sit on, bend over, and swallow, if you've got that kind of cash).... Let's face it, its not really that bad a gig. Yes, there are biblical and religious stigmas to the issue, but fuck it, when was the last time you were good? I mean really good. I mean you'd have no qualms casting the 1st to 5th stone. I thought so.....
As you all know, I'm a corporate slave to the financial sector. A prostitute of sorts, because I get paid to wear uncomfortable clothing, speak dirty words to strangers (please, thank you and I'm sorry always leave a bad taste in my mouth) and spend my hours doing jobs which take a little bit of my soul every time. And now that I have come to accept what I am, I have decided like my more traditional sorority sisters to drop all pretenses, and embrace it.
A prostitute sees something she likes and wants, possibly needs. And all she has to do is fuck someone to get it. Yes, it the amount of 'someones' can be a bit overstated, but still that's the bottom line. I want this, if I fuck so and so...(And so....) I can get it. Why the fuck not? Free enterprise I say!
Now back to me. I want something. I want something badly. I want a new job. New employment. And I am willing to fuck for it. Yes, you read that correctly. I will fuck you for a new job. I am not ashamed to say it, and even less so to do it. I don't even care anymore, such is the extent of my discontent. Man, woman, sheep..... I'll fuck you if you can get me a new job. I'll do a man, while a sheep is watching if that's what you want (you sick sick fuck). I'll violate a sheep, while eating veal and wearing a woolen sweater. The extents to which I'm willing to go to are endless, all for the chance to stroll into the office on a monday morning, wipe my ass with a resignation letter, and staple it to the picture of my boss's family she keeps on her desk.
So please, consider this write-up as my CV Unplugged, The Lost Tapes. I want a new job and I'm willing to do you, your spouse and the family pet, just to get it. If you're interested, call toll free on
080-U-HER-ME-N-IT. I guarantee a good time, lots of fun, and a well oriented, self starter with good interpersonal skills, the ability to work under pressure and sufficiently proficient with Microsoft office.
I am Womilee, and I will fuck you.

1 comment:

oluwawana said...

Dear Womilee,

I am Womiluu, and you will fuck me :D

Wonderful post. Eloquent writing, and the logic is just infallible.

Good one.

*subscribes to blog*

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