Recently actually since I returned from Greece I have been on some weird ass high I can not place.
But that is neither here nor there.
I have been happy.
You know that self hugging extra happy happy- That you worry about when it comes because you know it never lasts but it does.
And you are just happy and it doesn't go away.
And for the longest time I have been so scared to talk about this happiness because lets face it- I CAN go on and on about something ( re-greece) But for real I was also afraid because - awon aye will come and send all these negative vibes my way.
And also I had kind of gotten comfortable being a grouchy. cynic.
_ side bar; my friend says I'm broken. I tell him all the better- wider cracks for love to go into.
Anyways I also found that when ever I tried to write about happiness; It was difficult to translate that into words ( meh)
So here are the reasons I have been unable to be happy on the internet
1- all that negative energy
2- Fear that it would go away
3-The comfort of being an unhappy writer.
Which have all really made me feel like a fake person.
Anyways I have been laughing a lot. Like really laughing.
It is odd because I am already loud and I have a cackle-esque type laugh think ursla meets cruella de-vile. ( Im for real)
Anyways I find that I have been laughing loudly, This random throaty laugh that ( sometimes) morphs into a coughing fit and has me in tears ( not wailing). The good type that messes with your bottom lash eye liner but somehow leaves your mascara untouched.
Last night I was on the phone with my friend B- who makes me laugh so much; and I was laughing so hard I almost fell of the bed.
I caught myself and started laughing at that.
_side bar: I love men who make me laugh my random throaty laugh.
I keep saying I would write about my Greek trip in detail with photos as a result of the need to immortalize that holiday and all it did for my physce (sp?)but my legendary laziness overwhelms that need.
So I can not put my happiness into words- But it literally radiates from my being.
It is so random. ( I am really not self aware so I had to have people point it out to me)
Also two of my friends ( well the groom is hardly my friend) but the bride is my roll dawg,- got married.
And I introduced them to each other.
Then again you people already know how much I adore weddings so let me just say I over adored this one. i LOVED THE WEDDING SO HARD I THOUGHT MY HEART WILL BURST.
And you guys know how hard I love ( see lover related posts circa 2012)
But I genuinely honestly Loved this wedding from the make up champagne session and Ms spears blaring out of my super blue tooth speakers to all the crying her daddy did when they asked her to go to her new family to all the shoki to my amazing make up ( shout out to my cousin who always lets me get my way when it comes to make up and my skin)
Also I just loved the energy. It was good.
My body hurt too badly for work the next day so I worked only one day last week.
I felt a little bad till my boss called me and ripped me a new ass hole.
But even that could not dampen my happy stance.
I came to abuja on Monday and I woke up disoriented and confused on tuesday- which is strange because I really really really like my current hotel.
It is the cutest thing.
And it just gives off vibes of love nest ( HELLO MY ABUJA LOVERRRSSSS).
But just hello.
Sidebar- The Jollof rice at Jevnik is shit