Blindsided.

There are fewer things worse than knowing that you can not trust anyone.

Sort of opens your eyes to things you wish you never had to ever ever ever ever ever deal with.

But hey- C'est la vie.

Goal setting and divine encouragement

I do not run like a man running aimlessly- 1st Cor 9:26

Back drop.

When I was 12 I had a major surgery to correct a recurrent patella dislocation( which is as a result of your knees not being able to support your body weight) I had been experiencing in my left knee. It healed but left me with a scar that make me so self conscious- I was unable to wear anything that was above my knees.

Off course at 12, I did not finish therapy and I walk with a slight limp. That is fine- I have learned to live with it.

So Last week I decided to run the 5k marathon in Edinburgh. It is on the 13th of October and I decided while searching for a trainer to start intense exercises.

Off to the gym I went!

45 minutes of cardio and then some arm exercises I decided to get some work done on my knees and started doing some knee raises.

It was unusually painful but hey no pain no gain right? anyways I reduced the weight. Finished up and went to  lift weights for my arms and back.

I Finished that got on a mat to do some planks and stretches when I lay down and BOOM.
My knee gave way. I shit you not. blinding pain that was nothing like the pain I used to experience when I was 10 or 11.

Instantly- I just knew that 1- I had pushed myself too hard and 2- I might have lost too much weight.

Because I was ridiculously skinny as a child- I was told by my doctors that I needed to put on some weight and muscle so that my legs could support the rest of my body.

Since I decided to run the marathon, I had changed my eating patterns etc etc etc to healthier options and complex carbs for energy.

Anyway back to the pain. So I turned over and laid there till I stopped seeing stars and could make out the shapes of things around me. and did a couple of stretches.

I felt better after a few so I did some more.
On my way home- I ran into my class mate who I had never told about my gym runs ever- and he said " Ah even with your papers you are still going to the gym? this kind of dedication is serious o. Ah the man that marries you will enjoy with all the attention you you devote to certain things" he also invited me to his church to come for his worldwide communion service. Virtual cookies for anyone who can guess the name of said church.

Trust Nigerians to make EVERYTHING about marriage.
 All I sha took away from that I need to keep at it. Training for my 5k. Literally I feel like if I put my mind to it, my body will eventually co-operate.


Anyways that's that. I have completed my papers! * squeal*

I had no idea that they would turn me into an economics guru. With the help of Lekan obviously. LOL.

He literally had to help me interpret my regressions and tell me what each dependent variable meant. and then spell it out to me repeatedly. Lekan I can not thank you enough.

Anyways now I have to cut down 1k words- any economist that wants to actually look at the paper should get at me. 100 heads are better than one and all that. :)
My literary teacher said my writing has improved a thousand fold- she did not say thousand fold but her eyes said it. :)

hehe.

Have a good week guys!

The danger of a single story

You see the problem with stereotypes is not that they are incorrect, It is that they are incomplete- Chimamanda Adiche.

When I come here to bash Yoruba men, consistently ( i might add) I do it sarcastically and more often than not because I have enough ammunition to come to that conclusion.

However, I do not think it is logical for any reader to read 10 out of maybe 400 posts I have on here and confidently type out how " they understand I have reason to hate Yoruba people"

Which does not add up- as you see because I am Yoruba. I may not speak the language OR understand it or like the men BUT it does not make me any less a Yoruba person. I have Yoruba friends. Even more amusing I have my friend zone FULL of Yoruba men as friends.
Most importantly being Yoruba does not disqualify me from bashing Yoruba men.

I would have said it is my blog and I can bash who I want to bash- but I am a changed person.

Which is why I am confused. In my attempt to write satire, someone springs out from the wood works and is telling me how they understand my need to hate Yoruba people.

I am confused because no one forced you to read the article. The title was clear " Do not marry a Yoruba man" - If you are a yoruba man AND that offended you, Maybe you should not have read the post- Is all I'm saying.

The problem with the internet is that people are only able to draw conclusions from what they can see- which more often than not is incomplete.

So to my Yoruba reader who I do not know and does not know me- Your anger might be justified ( note I am using the word anger here loosely) because I do not know your story. I have no idea IF you might have lost out on the woman of your dreams solely because you are Yoruba. And so I can not honestly take anything you have said seriously.

Well maybe except the half hearted compliment you threw in about me writing properly when I am not bashing Yoruba people.

So thank you for reading my posts. And to all my other readers. Thank you.

However the posts are a 2D representation of my person and not my whole story.

If I have 10 out of 400 posts running down Yoruba men that is pretty much 2.5% . I'm not a mathematician BUT that figure strongly suggests that 10 posts are simply not enough to draw a conclusion on.


Let me also just throw out there that I am still blogging on my other blog. I know, I know. Now I have two. :)

I was going to come here and share my newest undertaking BUTTTT I had to sort this out. However once I finish my papers- I'll come right to it.x

Don't Marry a Yoruba Man.

After reading the marry a girl who reads and marry a man who travels series I started thinking.

Maybe I should do one of my own.

I was going to wait till after I write my papers BUT you know how it is.
- Side bar: EVERYBODY is getting married. I swear it is an epidemic of some sort.

And I think the information of this post will help those seeking.

Do marry a man that is EXACTLY like your father- that way you can actually take your mother's advice in marriage seriously. Learn from her mistakes and seek her out all so often. If all fails you would have built a relationship forged by the need of counsel and cemented by the tale of relate-able woes.

Do marry a man that does not/ can not save- Although you might resent him, you will automatically become indespensible as you will need to pay your children's fees and pitch in for general house hold up keep regularly. And that is fine- because you know every woman wants to be the one her husband leans on.

Do marry a man that has only one degree- But only if you have more than two. If you have one, do not. Otherwise dinner time will be filled with stories of when I was in school if any child of yours dares to complain about school. - Assuming you have dinner time conversations.

Do marry a man who you love more than yourself- Because when push comes to shove. His love wont keep you. Only your love can.

Do marry a man of different faith- After all variety is the spice of life. What better world to bring children into than a world where they are spoilt for choice faith wise?

To be honest I can go on and on and on, the point is this you can marry ANY man... BUT  a Yoruba man.

What ever you do:-
Do NOT marry a Yoruba man. There is no light at the end of the tunnel in such a marriage.
Except off-course you are a Yoruba girl who has learnt from the feet of a Yoruba mother in a polygamous home. Then and only then can you marry a Yoruba man.

You think the devil can lie till you date and marry a Yoruba man.


This is incomplete- I'll come back to it once I am done with my essays next week. How was your Monday? Ace?

On Helping

Till I moved here- I had no idea how hard it was to ask for help

I hated it. If I could not do something, I would learn it- take the time and struggle till I got it right.

I used to think that was how I was wired. Now I realise it was pride.

Moving here to do a second degree was a major eye opener in how little I knew.

I came here to do an Msc in Energy Finance and instead I found my self taking Law courses and Economics courses.

I was LOST. to say the least. I mean I did some reading and all of that BUT you can not read for 8 weeks what someone else went to university and studied for under-grad. Needless to say I had to ask for help.

Did I hate it- Always. But the more I did it the more I realised life did not have to be so hard.

I guess that is what we are put on earth for- To help each other.

And this applied to my spiritual life as well. There are things I do not struggle with. Never have and hopefully never will while I have watched people- friends, enemies - people generally struggle with and I just thought they were so weak.

Like how can this small thing mess you up like this? I'd think to myself. Then I realised that the reason I did not have the same problems was not because I am a better person( even though I strongly believed it at the time) but because of the grace of God.

Which I would explain in details going forward.

Moral of the story is this- Ask. If you need anything. Ask. And not google. I mean google has a lot of answers but not all the answers.

And for me I know it might seem like so small, But this is such a huge realization.

Ask and it shall be given unto you. Close mouth don't get fed.

All of this is spurred by my Economics research paper which I knew nothing about but I have a beautiful topic as well as a fabulous methodology and I am currently wrapping up.

I am thankful to God. because without him all of this would have been extremely impossible.


:) Hope you guys have a great week.

Remember to give today. and this week- there is so much poverty around. It would not hurt to bless someone out of our excesses. It could be time, money or even knowledge. Give a little.

Good days

Today was and is a good day.

My fancy phone case arrived. I LOVE IT.

It is sooooo  pretty. Everyone says it's vain- But since when did what everyone says matter?

Never- that's when.

After everyone expresses their excitement they talk about how they want one.

How can I get one? they ask.

I tell them- I'm selling them.

Do I want to sell them? I think so. Now I can finally add the term CEO to my bio.

Second- Lekan is back! * runs around in little circles* Lekan and I struck up the cutest weirdest friendship in the last 4 months and he has held my hand through most of my technical issues. He is an amazing researcher as well.

I am thankful.

Third. My paper is going on great.

I am about to start the 2nd one and I am finally opening up to learning- I am taking a law course this semester.

I am soooo excited about it.

This one year away from home I decided to do a lot of self improvement.

And I have, I have made so many steps to better myself and to go after what I really want.
And I am glad

I think I have grown so much in this year.

I am learning things about myself that I did not know. I find it hard to ask for help- which is odd because there is nothing wrong, I just always feel like I am disturbing people so I try not to ask too many questions.
I'm not talking about teachers sha- Im talking about students and random people. Strangest thing is that when I eventually ask- Its always so easy.

Till I moved here, I do not think I really understood the concept of Gods grace. I mean I knew of it- but I did not know it. And it is beautiful.

I have taken to reciting a list of things that God has promised me- I call them my bible promises.

I think I need to enlarge the list. It is basically a list of things I want and I am calling forth supported by the bible- If God said it, It must be true. Hence- I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

That is the first line of my bible promises. I love them.

In the last few months- I have struggled with unforgiveness. I have held on to so much anger. Then I read mark 11:25. I do not struggle anymore because it is a luxury I can not afford. It's too expensive a cost.
Spiritually.

Lately I have been drawn to bible stories and the role of sex in our lives. I read the story of  Samson and something struck me. Delilah had betrayed him THREE different times. Yet he did not drive her away. She eventually led him to his downfall

I do not know why- but IF you have people in your life who are hanging you out to dry and constantly leaking your secrets and what not. Do not be afraid to cut them off. This could be anything really, Friends telling you, you are not beautiful enough. Co-workers saying you are not " anything" enough. Partners leaking your secrets. What ever it is.  Do not be like Samson who was shacking up with prostitutes of the valley. Keep your circle small. tight and Loyal.


I feel like someone needed that.

Anyways its Midnight and I am at the library. I have missed my random blogging on blogspot. I'll keep my wordpress only so that I can like and reblog stuff. But Blogger- You are my first love and you have my heart.

ps: as usual I did not proof read. all typo's are mine.x

Back

Feels so nice to be back.

I can not over emphasize the gratitude I have for God.
These few months have been am eye-opener and God not only kept me through them, He brought me through them.

I can not thank God enough.
In your spare time, I help me thank him.