Reminder

The secret of success is constancy of purpose.

I moved jobs last year because I was burning out and the sort of life I would have wanted to live with Eros would have been difficult if not impossible with those hours.

And also because I wanted more money.

I did not get as much money as I thought- because as with money; usually the importance wanes once you cross a threshold. ( I mean no one ever has enough money, but you get my point), I found out that I had crossed a threshold a long time ago for money. My core needs are limited to fuel. and travel.

I do not live with Eros anymore and thus there is no need for the purpose of navigating double unit living arrangement.

I also thought I was burning out and needed to slow down; while I love the idle life; it's not purposeful enough for me.

The happiness you are searching for comes through reflecting on the worthy aims you are dedicated to achieving and then taking action daily to advance them.

And that is what I need to remind myself every time I feel overwhelmed with studying and panicking that I might fail the exams.
Even though I'm studying.

I started getting job offers that would have made so much sense if I was interested in staying the course of my old career track. I was telling my ex-co-worker that I ran into that I had to turn down all these offers, he said to me" Now is the time for those offers, you weren't ready then", and to be honest, I still do not feel very ready.

But back to purpose of working. I have always been someone with exemplary organizational skills. Highly emotionally intelligent and such a sweet soul that it only made sense that I do something along those lines eventually. I'd love to retire into academia and teach part time and publish white papers. and so on and so forth 

Long story short is that I'm switching careers; writing these exams; going through all this stress because the work that I do has to be value adding and I am ready to make money. A lot more money than I currently make.

Also because I miss ball bursting work.
And all the pleasure I found in it.

My friend, who is a real estate developer, stopped by my office to see me today, since the hours will be bloody, he said " you are moving back to stress"
And I'm like " Maybe, maybe not", And if I hate it so much I can always just get another gig that will be lax like this.

He said you have a point.

and I came back to my desk to scour the web as I am less busy and came across this post about this girl who worked a whole year in a light fixture factory and got a masters in accountancy so she could get a job in the company of her dreams.

That was all the light I needed to know that I should fashion myself towards the light of flexibility of goals.

Actually I have to pass these exams, because one of you people's daddies offered to get me the job if only I'd sleep with him; anyway so now I have to wait till I get the exact damn job and run into him in the elevator and shame him.

Rubbish.

In conclusion:
I'm writing these exams because I want a new job in a new field; and because I know no other way to get where I'm going than through hard back breaking work peppered with sleepless nights etc etc etc.