Random thought Dump

 First thought- I am really happy with my life. Is it perfect no, but am I happy yes.

So many people I know turned 40 this year and honestly they are still all babies.

Perhaps Dele momodu calling himself a youth at 50 might be on to something. What is it about life moving so fast but almost staying the same? I feel like me moving was me breaking the loop and changing the cycle of my life. sometimes I pinch myself and tell my husband- OMG we actually did it- we moved countries?

i'm dog sitting and I've said it 1 million times that God gave us dogs so we can have real life experiences of what its like to be God. Today I was walking the dog for a walk and we got to the traffic light and he lunged into the street, obviously I pulled him back and pressed the pedestrain button and restrained him till we could safely cross the road without the risk of being hit, and I was thinking that this must be how God is with me and my desires, me rushing. him stalling to make sure the road is clear.

I thought I was really in my own lane and not worried about external opinions  but then I wanted to launch a circle and I'm paralyzed. But at the same time I'm like Kim Kardashian is doing tiktok shop so what is paralzying me in asking people to pay for my services? I guess I need to get used to asking people for things.

3 months into my new Job and its actually really good. I might need to get a second one for my PR sha, I mean PJ will learn french and I will do the HC pathway and which ever pans out - All Glory to God.

I hate how once you see something, you cant unsee it- watched a christmas movie yesterday and there were only 4 black people in the whole movie. Bruh. all were women and 3 were service workers. It was dry but I was like wow, no one caught this? 

I have also noticed that the west lumps black with LGBTQ if that makes sense. So if there is a queer xter, there may or may not be a black xter because its one box and I'm like upon all your DEI attempts none of you have been able to figure out that a race & sexuality are different.

Anyway na their wahala. I watched Asake's redbull symphonic thingy today and I was like we need to start doing things at home. The diaspora crowd was great but all the front row was sat. and NOT singing, I get the zeal to conquer the world but eventually we are going to have to recognize that east or west home is best. And alsooooo what is the new orchestra craze? AG is also doing his show with a full orchestra and I'm like who is telling the nigerian artists that this is the way- the album is called FUJI wetin concern talking drum with violin?

I fear relocation has radicalized me because last week my co-workers were like they saw a mouse at the venue of an event we hosted, and I was like did you ppl run? and they said no and I'm like you sure it wasn't a rat? and they said no mice are cute, rat are bigger and ugly. I said wow. the light skin propaganda is extending to animals huh. they were all quiet but I now know the jokes to share with them. 

The other day we were discussing the ashely madison documentary and I said it was crazy that a man killed himself because he was caught cheating on his wife, and someone was like so you are  pro adultery? I said no- I'M PRO LIFE. the fuck? Honestly Yt ppl crack me up. 

This christmas I am not hosting because I wanna walke up and eat breakfast and rest.

New shows Ive watched & love include the mighty nein- if you liked castlevania, you'd love this. Sleeper cell- 10/10 show so obviously based on a book and Down Cemetry road also based on a book and really good.

Books I've read and currently love- moroti wants a virgo. 10/10 Naija Romcom that makes sense. 

sha sha, Happy holidays wishing all of you happiness this holiday! 

How fantastic is it that I don't need anything this year asides my permanent resident permit. 

Pray for me

via GIPHY

Birthday Girl

Happy Birthday to me.

This year for some reason I wanted a super quiet birthday, well I didn't want to deal with cleaning up after hosting and also I'm going on holiday next week so I'm like Yeah I gotta rest.

This probably my most quiet birthday but I find that I've really not enjoyed doing anything birthday wise since I turned 30. I used to take the day off work and just relax, like do nothing all day and just chill till the next day. But luckily for me this year it was a sunday so I went to church come home cooked a box of chicken for people who'd pop in and then did some laundry.

When I was done I watched some TV and when my guests came, I hosted and when they left I cleaned up. and went to bed. 

I did not do a birthday wish list because I plan to raise money for a project my cousin is working on in the mean time and also because I do not need anything at all, and this is a scary realization.

I have a good number of my material needs met, although I would love a decent wide legged pair of jeans, black loafers and a long champ tote bag, I am not in the market for anything which is interesting because the first two years of living here I was like I need this and that and this and that but honestly I don't need any of those things. All that asideeeeee, Actually what I need is to find a facialist in my city and have her do my face every 3 weeks till I get rid of all the texture & hyperpigmentation.

Actually, I'm lying, what I'd really love is to go home for christmas. Actually I'd love an ITA before the end of the year.

Anyway I've been at work for 2 months now and it feels like 10 months I've been working like someone with something to prove and I have been proving it. But I know that I need to find a more challenging role. and soon.

That being said I super thankful and looking forward and calling forth my canadian passport because I'm readyyyyyy.

 

I watched the girlfriend show on Prime

 And immediately knew it was from a book.

But like most things in life, I'm very happy with the gift of hindsight. 

But I laughed so hard at the end because I'm like Daniel is so daft. 

But also, if a family doesn't like you, just keep it moving. No need for a desperation.

Honestly. Marrying into a family who doesn't like you is just like using a basket to fetch water.

A waste of your time.

 

 

Life update and random musings

 So as you know I recently graduated from school and my work contract ended so I was in that limbo where I had applied for a work permit and at the same time I needed to find a job so I could extend my husbands work permit. Anyway to cut the long story short I got a job- Thank you GOD.

So next thing was obviously building a work capsule wardrobe because even though I have never been big on dressing up to work ever, I am now at almost 40 years old, realizing that I have lost the wear anything to work privileges  because everyone obviously knows how great you are at your job  I enjoyed in Nigeria and I now have to make an effort.

Anyway I had a budget of 150 CAD but realized that I'd have to get creative because the stores in my city were not really hitting. Anyway I went across the border and LUCKILY for me my friend is coming for a wedding in a few weeks and is staying with me so I did a bit a shopping, using like 2/3rd's of my budget in the US- and got a pair of shoes, 5 tops & one black skirt. Honestly clothes have gotten so expensive.

and I didn't stop there, same friend was going to London before coming here so I obviously did another spot of shopping because duh everyone knows the stuff in the UK is so much better fashion/ color & quality wise. So I spent the rest of my budget and an extra $20 on a pair of cream loafers, two tops, one dress ( that is probably not work appropriate), and a pair of tiger print capris I just know my ass will look fantastic in. 

I'm really happy with the items- just incase you cant tell and I am really looking forward to getting into the north American workforce. with all my well thought out outfits and slicked back pony.

I also bought a wig from Nigeria and honest that wig looked like all of Nigeria's problems rolled in one. I know I need to style it but God knows I want to send it back or maybe sell it on Facebook market place because the way I know I wont even wear it at all. its annoying me, I will likely get a random headband wig from amazon that will probably do a better job for me.

Last thing I am really happy with how this  Canada journey has turned out. 

Obviously now I am stopping to revel in this win and this phase but at the back of my mind, getting my permanent residence status remains my priority and the more I think about it, the more I am reminded that God that did all this will do that for me as well.

That being said I am actually really excited for this new phase and I am looking forward to having a blast in my new role with my new baffs and with my new routine. I am now truly learning the meaning of just enjoying the journey I look back at a the last two years and I'm like God you are so good. so much has happened, we have moved houses, I'm on my 3rd Job, My husbands short got nominated at a film festival. So much good is happening and I want to encourage anyone who is in a limbo/transition phase in relocation that there is still so much good in life happening that all you have to do is take note.

I hope you are all well and are taking time to see all the good things happening to you.

:)

School is DONE

 And lets talk about it.

When I tell you that this program DRAINED THE HELL OUT OF ME?

My God, I'm so so so happy its over because bruh, even my mum was like you took this thing seriously o. I said yes o. I took it VERY seriously because it wasn't cheap and it is a means to an end that needs to be solid.

Anyway I'm done and honestly if you want to move to Canada just learn French man. I think the pathway for school has sort of ended, but that's just my opinion.

Be that as it may- YAYYYYYY.

I am so relived. I feel like I am finally decompressing and getting myself back again.

I'm also now in the favor market so please if you know anyone hiring in YVR- send me a message refer me, do something please.

I'm sooo looking forward to all the possible activites that I may get up to this summer starting with exploring my city but yeah just really thankful that this chapter has closed.

:)

Who the son sets free

 is truly free indeed.

:)

One thing about me?

 I'm gonna write. Bruh Life has been lifing.

And not in a bad way in a way that life can be when it just lifes, throwing spanners in your wheels and stuff. but I'm not complaining I'm actually grateful for this life.

I'm in the market looking for a full time role since I finish school in a few weeks * EEEEKKK, can you imagine school is almost over* whew thank you God. Because ONLY God in heaven could have done it for me.

That being said- networking is urgh. I went to an event mixer last night and I was the ONLY black person. I think what is most jaring about this move is being the only black person in a space. its weird. And I don't think the owners of said spaces really mind.

Anyway as I was networking rather demurely I was talking to an asisan drunk guy who was like are you looking for an entry level role? and I said no- I am looking for something a lil more advanced and he was like really and I was like yes I have over 15 years of experience in my finance field and he screamed- YOU SHOULD HAVE LED WITH THAT.

And I was like hmnn should I though? There is a whole thing with Canadians and their zeal for canadian experience which I thank God I now have after a year of working and it fascinating to see how their faces change when I tell them oh I have a job I'm just looking for something in this field, and they are so annoyed- or maybe they aren't annoyed and I'm reading them wrong - but it feels like they grudginly have to open the gate for me, and honestly I get it.

Moving abroad is honestly the biggest amount of social climbing I've ever had to do but boy am I a fast learner. LOL

That being said my husband turned 40 and my plans of throwing a party in lagos were thwarted by IRCC- basically our visa extension that we applied for SINCE AUGUST 2024 hasn't come out, and honestly now I finally understand when people are saying immigration is insane its stuff like this- the Limbo of not knowing what your fate will be, and even though I know It's not personal, It feels very very very personal. So we had a party at home. which was nice. small but you know it is what it is. 

Like I missed my grand ma's 90th birthday in December and now I miss this party that we'd have had. It just feels like what is the whole point? At the networking event last night I met someone whose dad owned a farm but he was studying business at another University so I asked him why he wasn't lookiing for an internship and he said - oh he and the family are going to Italy for summer, and I told him that was the absolute correct choice. He seemed surprised. I told him your family won't be here forever make time to spend time with them.

For some reason everyone was like OMG your husband is 40? and I'm like Yes and they always chuckle and say why did I think you were older- and I tell them its because you have conflated kindness in men with being young and struggle to see someone willing to help their wife so you ultimately assume that he must be younger that his wicked old wife. Actually I don't say that because I'm aware of social cues instead I say he is a health nut who works out everyday and eats very clean. Two things can be true.

I just got off a meeting with my MD and he was literally raking so much about the changes that the business is forced to reckon with because of trump and the AI voice assistant  on teams was like "it seems you are in a high stakes situation" 

Me: Good for all of you.

Honestly on one hand I'm happy that they are all seeing that crazy isn't always better- could have told them that from day 0, I mean I left tinubu. But the second thing which is even more insane is that when he starts screaming I'm just like - my dear I was raised in Nigerian work force, all our bosses used to do was shout. Trust me- IDGAF. 

All of that off my chest I'm really happy about lent, I'm also looking forward to finishing my program on time and having my evenings free, I keep imagining what I'd do with the free time I have. 

Maybe finally write my book.

Hope you are all well, and Q1 is going splendidly- fun fact I have two published authors in the book club I run.

Not to brag but its giving winners circle. :)